1. “The truth is easily debunked by how I feel. Quit trying to confuse me with your high brow logical logic, rational reasoning, sensible sense and factual facts. If I identify as the earth and I tell you to get off, you better take a hike (just not on me). Just because I do not look like a male, or a female, or a pretzel, or a dog, or a cat doesn’t mean I’m not a giraffe. You’re not allowed to hurt my feelings because I am special, but I can hurt your feelings because you are not.
2. “Your insanity is not my problem, and I’m no longer going to be quietly quiet and silently silent because I have the power of The Crybaby. That’s right, Crybaby power. Hear me roar.
3. “People think life is about them, about their happiness. They couldn’t be more wrong. Life is not about them. Life is about ME. Life is about MY happiness. All those other people are nuts.
4. “If life screws with my life, I’ll screw it right back. How dare life be different than I think it should be. How dare life not go my way. I have the perfect right,(even an obligation) to complain when life stupidly creates people who do not think like me, people who do not look, act, and do things MY way. What was life thinking?
5. “IT’S MY WAY OR YOU WILL PAY.” That’s my motto. My body, mind, and emotions have needs, wants, and desires. It’s my job to fulfill them. It is unrealistic, irrational, illogical, nonsensical and unreasonable for me to roll over and accept life being different than the way I think it should be. Just because life has been getting away with doing things its way–for like forever–gives it no right to continue doing that now that I am here. It’s time to let life know who I am, to show life what I can do. It’s time to RELEASE: THE CRYBABY.
6. “It’s time to show the world just how big of a pain in the ass I can be when life doesn’t go my way. I will never let people who disagree with me, be at peace, happy and joyful. I’ll make them pay. I’ll make them regret that they were ever born. I will make them repent that they ever befriended, dated, or married me. This is my life. I’ll give ‘em hell. I’ll make their lives miserable. I WILL UNLEASH THE CRYBABY!
7. “When my mind is not happy, I make sure no one is happy. When my mind is unpleasant, I make sure everyone is unpleasant. I will never be at peace when life doesn’t go my way. I will never let my mind accept reality. If I accept reality, I would be nuts. Well I am not nuts. But I will drive reality nuts. I will use my CRYBABY weapons of mass misery. I will give people the silent treatment, pout, sulk, bitch and moan. I will get irritated, upset and angry. I will show them just how unpleasant I can make their lives. And if they try to share logic and reason that doesn’t jive with my jive, there will be hell to pay. I will use the weapon I used when I was a two-year old. I will throw tantrums, roll on the floor, gyrate my body, thrash and flail my legs and arms, pummel myself, yell, scream, swear like a sailor, and then get up and throw things. If I must I’ll use my ultimate weapon: I’ll look them in the eyes and yell, “You don’t love me!” and then walk away all huffy and puffy like, and later, when they are lucky enough to see me again, I’ll use my body language, slouch, frown, look dejected, unconsolable, and then smack ‘em with dirty looks. Never undervalue the destructively rejuvenating power of THE CRYBABY.
Sunday, March 31, 2024
intero 2
intro
When something happens that you don’t like, the only rational response is to cry about it. Thankfully there are many ways to do that. If life is screwing you, screw it right back. How dare life be different than you think it should be. You have the perfect right to complain when someone isn’t like you, doesn’t think like you, doesn’t look like you, doesn’t do things your way. So many people think life is about them, about their happiness. They couldn’t be more wrong. Life is about you, YOUR happiness. Those other people are nuts.
“IT’S YOUR WAY OR THERE’S HELL TO PAY.” That’s your motto. Your body, mind, and emotions have needs, wants, and desires. It’s your job to fulfill them. It is unrealistic, irrational, illogical, nonsensical and unreasonable for you to roll over and accept life being different than the way you think it should be. Just because life has been getting away with doing things its way for like forever, gives it no right to continue doing that now that you’re here. It’s time to let life know who you are, to show it what you can do. It’s time to RELEASE: THE CRYBABY.
It’s time to show the world just how big of a pain in the ass you can be when life doesn’t go your way. Do not let people who disagree with you, be at peace, happy and joyful. Make them pay. Make them regret that you were ever born. Make them repent that they ever befriended, dated, or married you. This is your life. Give ‘em hell. Make their lives miserable. UNLEASH THE CRYBABY!
When your mind is not happy, make sure no one is happy. When your mind is unpleasant, make sure everyone is unpleasant. Never be at peace when life doesn’t go your way. Never let your mind accept reality. If you accept reality, you’re nuts. Don’t be nuts. Drive reality nuts. Drive others nuts. Use your weapons: give them the silent treatment, pout, sulk, bitch and moan. Get irritated, upset and angry. Show them just how unpleasant you can make their lives. And if they try to share logic and reason that doesn’t jive with your way–which is THE way, the right way–make sure there’s hell to pay. Use the weapon you used when you were a two-year old, throw a tantrum, roll on the floor, gyrate your body, thrash around, flail your legs and arms, pummel yourself, yell, scream, swear like a sailor, and then get up and throw things. To add insult to injury use your ultimate weapon: Look them in the eyes and yell, “You don’t love me!” and then walk away all huffy and puffy like, and later, when they are lucky enough to see you again, use your body language, slouch, frown, look dejected, unconsolable, and then smack ‘em with dirty looks. Never undervalue the destructively rejuvenating power of THE CRYBABY.
The plague of crybabies has reached pandemic levels just in time for the “karens” and the “woke.” We wouldn’t be enjoying them if it wasn’t “THE TIME OF CRYBABIES” (soon to be a movie called DELUSIONAL CULTURES THAT DESTROYED THEMSELVES). I’m very grateful to live the movie instead of watching it. Movies aren’t nearly as entertaining as the real thing.
If you want to experience a crybaby unleashed, take away its phone or other computer or gaming device, or just be there when a “Karen” or “Woke” person decides to bless you with free entertainment.
1. “Logic and reason are easily debunked by feelings,” said no sane person ever.
2. Did you know there is a Crybaby Anonymous? It’s called, CA, or Kaka for short. There are seven billion nonmembers doing their best to not be anonymous. There are no meetings, but anti-social media meets every few seconds. You can freely yell, “LIFE IS NOT FAIR!” and no one will care. The main topic at Crybaby Anonymous is, Things That Suck. Sub-sucking topics include certain people, some places, some spouses, all ex-spouse (every damn one of them) roommates, ex roommates, cheap dates, stupid jobs, horrible schools, totally nuts teachers, shit masquerading as food, lack of gimme gimme government, weather that leaks on your parade, mother-in-laws that know your not good enough for their “perfect” child, and teenagers with an IQ over 136. Other suck-subjects include accidents you planned for someone else that backfired, sicknesses and disease caused by eating shit disguised as food, disability from thinking you’re smarter than a ladder, and, why your parents didn’t buy bullet proof condemns. And finally, wrinkly, sagging boob and butts that look like your face, Alien hair growth, Falsifying your face with teeth, rickety and feeble Chinese replacement body parts, and re-toilet-not training for seniors, and, why are funerals so popular? These will be cried about. Trophies will go to the complainer and whiner with the saddest story, reddest eyes or whoever brought the most Kleenex. All meetings are video tapped for your pleasure in case of Alzheimer, dementia, or reincarnation.
2. Who invented Crybabies? Parents and society programmed their dropplings to sound like bummed-out snowflakes melting over an open fire. From birth, parents reacted to their little shit-makers midnight, shrieking by asking, “Remind me why we had this kid?” and then, thereafter, they continued to program their little puke-spewers to be forever after crybabies by catering to their every discomfort, and then, under penalty of law, they were forced to endure them and suffer them until their glorious release from parental prison when their kids finally turned forty-five and had to evict them from their bedrooms (which their parents immediately turned into indoor swimming pools filled with sharks and no warning signs).
3. The Details: What follows is scientifically backed, ‘pee’ reviewed, and absolutely confirmed conjecture about why you might be a crybaby: When you were a baby you screamed when you got physically uncomfortable and someone cared for you so you’d be comfortable and shut-up. As a child you cried when you got emotionally uncomfortable and someone indulged you so you’d be satisfied and shut-up. As a youth you belly-ached when you got mentally uncomfortable and someone counseled you so you’d feel gratified and shut-up. As a teenager you complained when you got spiritually uncomfortable and someone guided you so you’d feel at peace and shut-up. And now as an adult you cry, scream, belly-ache and complain when life doesn’t cater to your every nonsensical, ludicrous and silly need, want and desire and everyone wishes you’d shut-up.
Friday, March 29, 2024
THE CRYBABY BOOK - Understanding the Minds of Crybabies
It’s time to show the world just how big of a pain in the ass you can be when life doesn’t go your way. Do not let people who disagree with your perspective be at peace, happy and joyful. Make them pay. Make them regret that you were ever born. Make them repent that they ever befriended, dated, or married you. This is your life. Give ‘em hell. Make their lives miserable. RELEASE THE CRYBABY!
Never be at peace, when life doesn’t go your way. Never let your mind accept reality. Don’t do it. Don’t be nuts. Drive them nuts. Use your weapons: pout, sulk, bitch and moan. Get irritated, upset and angry Show them just how unpleasant you can make their lives if they share logic and reason that doesn’t jive with your opinions, biases, prejudices, belief, and conclusions. Use the weapon you used when you were a two-year old (by now it should be perfected) throw a tantrum, roll on the floor, gyrate your body, flail your legs and arms, yell, scream, swear like a sailor, and then get up and throw things. To put the icing on the cake, use your ultimate weapon: yell at them, “You don’t care, like or love me!” and then huff and puff and storm away while throwing them dirty looks. Never undervalue the destructive power of THE CRYBABY.
1. Crybaby Anonymous is here to yelp. There are seven billion nonmembers. Meetings are every third Monday of each week. You can freely yell, “LIFE IS NOT FAIR!” and no one will care. The main topic at Crybaby Anonymous is, Things That Suck. Sub topics include all people, some places, all spouse, ex-spouse, roommates, ex roommates, dates, jobs, school, teachers, restaurants, government, and of course, weather, mother-in-laws, and teenagers. Other suck subjects include (but not limited to) accidents, illness, disease, disability, and paper cuts. And finally, wrinkles, sagging boobs, weird hair growths, false teeth, old age and death will be cried about. Trophies will go to the complainer and whiner with the saddest story, reddest eyes or whoever brought the most Kleenex. All meetings are video taped for your pleasure in case of Alzheimer, dementia, or death.
2. Who invented Crybabies? Parents and society programmed their dropplings to sound like bummed-out snowflakes melting over an open fire. From birth, parents reacted to their little shit-makers midnight, shrieking by asking, “Remind me why we had this kid?” and then, thereafter, they continued to program their little puke-spewers to be forever after crybabies by catering to their every discomfort, and then, under penalty of law, they were forced to endure them and suffer them until their glorious release from parental prison when their kids finally turned forty-five and were forced to move out of their bedroom (which their parents immediately turned into indoor swimming pools filled with sharks and no warning signs).
3. The Details: What follows is scientifically backed, ‘pee’ reviewed, and absolutely confirmed conjecture about why you might be a crybaby: When you were a baby you screamed when you got physically uncomfortable and someone cared for you so you’d be comfortable and shut-up. As a child you cried when you got emotionally uncomfortable and someone indulged you so you’d be satisfied and shut-up. As a youth you belly-ached when you got mentally uncomfortable and someone counseled you so you’d feel gratified and shut-up. As a teenager you complained when you got spiritually uncomfortable and someone guided you so you’d feel at peace and shut-up. And now as an adult you cry, scream, belly-ache and complain when life doesn’t cater to your every nonsensical, ludicrous and silly need, want and desire and everyone wishes you’d shut-up.
4. Life doesn’t care if you cry, scream, belly-ache, complain or go nuts. Life is neutral; life is impersonal; life is unbiased and life doesn’t care what you think it is, or what you think it should be, or what you think it should do. If you are still a crybaby it is because your conditioning, programming, indoctrination, propaganda and brainwashing from youth were excellent. It can be summed up in this: , Most adults will not depart from the bullshit they were fed when young. Which means most humans will not remove their programs of unrealistic and irrational expectations of what life should be and reprogram themselves to accept life for what it actually is, which ultimately means they will live and die the way they were born, a crybaby when life doesn’t go their way.
5. You can tell you’re in the presence of a crybaby when you hear its mantra, “Hey...I’m here. Let’s talk about me, about my life. I have needs, wants and desires that need your attention, and I didn’t come here to hear you babble about your inconsequential life.”
6. The most common sound of the crybaby species in the wild is, “LIFE ISN’T FAIR AND YOU ALL SUCK!”
7. Crybaby Disease: Life-is-life, the rest is listening to humans cry about it. Many humans have Crybaby Disease. The symptoms: They freak-out when they went north and life went south–shit didn’t go their mind’s way. The cure: Accept that life will not always go your mind’s way. HOW? Don’t kick a flat tire. Don’t give a flat tire your energy–no thoughts, no emotions. Don’t get angry. Just fix the freaking tire instead of freaking-out and kicking the freaking tire. Kicking the tire only makes it mad, which makes you as mad as a hatter.
Thursday, March 21, 2024
THE UNVARNISHED TRUTH
THE UNVARNISHED TRUTH
Humans are one of life’s many experiments, or experiences. Sometimes an experiment doesn’t go the way life thinks it will, and sometimes life gets bored and ends an experiment.
ABOUT HUMANS–WHAT HUMANS DIDN’T DO
Humans did not create space, energy, energy-forms, the universe, galaxies, solar systems, planets, the Earth.
Humans did not create the plants and animals on Earth.
Humans did not create themselves. Humans were created by life, just like life created everything humans sense and things humans cannot sense.
A human did not give itself it’s body-form, looks, color (ethnicity) intelligence (IQ) propensities (willpower, self-control, tenacity, personality, nor many of its other abilities or the lack thereof).
Humans do not control how their internal organs work. Human bodies keep themselves alive with very little intervention from the human’s brain/mind.
WHAT HUMANS MUST DO TO STAY ALIVE
Human bodies need food, water, clothes, shelter, physical activity and sleep. Human bodies are aware when they are hungry, thirsty, hot, cold, need to pee and poop and work, rest, and sleep. All a human brain/mind needs to do, to stay alive, is do what the body tells it needs.
WHAT HUMANS ARE
You are a child of earth. You are made of earth. You came out of the earth and will go back inside the earth when you die. Human brains/minds are self-aware. The mind knows it is alive. The brain is aware of what it is thinking. The brain is aware of its bodies needs.
Everything is made of “energy”–every person, place, and thing. Humans are energy in form. You are an energy-form. All energy in form is finite, temporary, limited, and bound. When energy is unbound–released from form–it rejoins the unbound energy that is the source of life. Humans are temporary avatars made of energy, and are energy in the form of what humans have named, human. Humans are part and portion of life itself.
WHAT HUMAN MINDS/BRAINS BELIEVE THEY ARE
A young child’s brain/mind doesn’t know anything, so it has no beliefs. It has no opinions, biases, prejudices, philosophies, theologies, no judgements and draws no conclusions until it is taught and has experiences.
The human body knows what it is–an animal.
The human self-aware mind doesn’t know what it is, so it makes shit up. It’s called belief. It’s called faith. It’s called hope. And it calls feelings (created in response to thoughts) accurate and trustworthy, even when their feelings are wrong (feelings not generated by thoughts tend to be somewhat more accurate and trustworthy).
WHAT YOU ARE NOT
You are not human (as defined). You are not your body, mind, and emotions. You (life itself) has a body, mind, and emotions. You are not what you have been indoctrinated to believe.
WHAT YOU REALLY ARE
The real you is energy, unbound, unlimited, infinite. You are life itself (temporarily playing a human).
WHY DOES KNOWING (EXPERIENCING THAT YOU ARE LIFE ITSELF) HAVE VALUE? HOW DOES THAT SERVE YOU AND BENEFIT YOU WHILE PLAYING A HUMAN?
You won’t take life so damn serious. You won’t be afraid to die. You will enjoy ALL your experiences, and you will be thankful and appreciate every one of them. You will stop living in your mind and start living life unconditionally, not programmed, not indoctrinated, not brainwashed, not propagandized. You will no longer view life as other human minds think life is. You will enjoy all that is life. You will enjoy your adventure as a human on Death World.
Wednesday, March 20, 2024
FREE BOOK ABOUT LIFE - and worth every penny - no refunds
INTRODUCTION
These numbered thoughts about life, earth, humans, human minds, human thinking and the feared CRYBABY section have been meticulously scattered in random surprise and willy-nilly disorder to provide unexpected and discombobulating experiences–just like life. If two numbered thoughts contradict each other, just ignore one of the numbers.
WARNING: Children below the age of two still living at home should not read this book without parental consent because it will screw-up their lives knowing this stuff (on the other hand, they’ll eventually be teenagers anyway).
ABOUT LIFE
1. The purpose of life is not to personally torment you. The purpose of Life is for humans to torment each other–which is why marriage was invented (to make torment legal).
2. Earth is a killer theme park. Violent death fuels life. That’s why it’s called DEATH WORLD. To live, you eat. To eat you kill, or you pay a killer, or you starve to death. The proof of that truth is your die-t.
3. Humans gut, pluck, skin, slice and dice to eat, wether animal or plant corpses. The living beat the shit out of the dead until they’re tender, and then bite, rip, chomp, chew, swallow burp, fart and poop to live and poop another day.
4. Humans are not the only ones that kill. Mother nature kills humans, exterminates her off-spring, kills her babies. She will reclaim you ass-sets. She will repossess your butt. From birth, nature-mommy raises humans for lunch meat for her micro-organisms that love to feast at the human-body buffet until humans are bare bones. Mommy is a genocidal mass-serial-killer cannibal.
5. Life is a buffet and you are the main course and your children are dessert. Welcome to your warm and fuzzy mother-earth home. Life is a deadly picnic, a fatal smorgasbord. You’re on the menu. You enter crying, screw around and birth more food for mother nature’s unsatiable appetite, and leave screaming. In the end YOU are manure. Enjoy your visit. Have fun. Go out laughing.
6. Humans are entertaining. Humans make other humans (occasionally quite often by accident). They have fun, and nine months later they have babies and put up a sign in their baby’s bedroomS: CAUTION, TEENAGER UNDER CONSTRUCTION.
7. All humans bring sunshine into a room, some by entering, some by leaving, some by disappearing–in an obituary.
8. If brainwashing during your suckling years wasn’t enough to drive you nuts, along came your goofy relatives and weird friends spouting their cockamamie opinions and beliefs about life. You might have survived that onslaught, but then came culture, society, schooling, advertising and Hollywood brandishing their self-serving propaganda. The murder of your mind as a sane thinker was no accident. It was a premeditated conspiracy to turn you into a mindless, obedient, and productive societal drone–and it worked. If you think it did not work, that’s proof that it did work, and it’s evidence why some humans identify as emotional support chickens.
9. A human holding its newborn has questions. Will it be a Republican, Democrat, or serial killer? And what do we do if it doesn’t like cheese cake?
10. Raise up a child in the way it should go (program it) and outwardly it will submit to its parent’s rules while inwardly plotting its revenge or escape or both, unless it doesn’t want to jeopardize its trust fund or inheritance–a storage unit where their parents hid the bodies.
11.
Life is a bunch of projects,
Things to do until dead,
An endless potpourri of hustle and hurry,
A do this, no, do that instead.
I absolutely fathom the secrets of this life.
It’s an endless array of prodigious forays,
A nettling vexation of strife.
And when a long day is over,
After all of my pain,
I go to bed tired, having lost all my fire,
Then wake up and do it again.
I want breakfast, lunch and dinner,
And something between to do,
And then when I die, I’ll give a high-five,
And rot in a plot near you.
12. Humans come with an expiration date, like a package of hamburger. Being a temporary human with an expiration date has benefits. (1) Payback may be attempted but not consummated. (2) Your time may run out and you die before you get unlucky. (3) You can avoid baths and be justifiably stinky–folks will just think you’re past your throw it away date and call the morgue and say, “For hell sakes, do your job!”
13. You were born with three amazing abilities, bad breath, body odor and gas. They are your weapons. Learn to use them. They’re the only superpowers you will ever have.
14. If you wake up in the morning all sucky, and say, “Damn, another day in paradise,” but really mean, “Damn, another day on Sucky World,” your mind has a serious case of LIFE SUCKS. What to do? Focus on when life is in a good mood, like when it wipes out a city so fast that the residents don’t knows they’re dead until they realize the light at the end of the tunnel is not a freight train.
15. Humans don’t always identify as humans. Identifying as something other than human has consequences. Humans who identify as flies live 25 days. Cats have 9 lives. If you identify as a turtle it comes with a free RV. If you identify as a...............
Saturday, March 16, 2024
THE BOOK OF LIFE march 16 2023
THE BOOK OF LIFE
1. The purpose of life is not to personally torment you. The purpose of Life is for humans to torment each other–which is the reason marriage was invented–makes it legal.
2. Life created humans and hasn’t stopped laughing since. Humans are entertaining. Life made humans for its pleasure, for its fun. Humans make humans too, mostly by accident. They had fun, and nine months later they have an infant, a teenager under construction.
3. All humans bring sunshine into a room, some by entering, some by leaving, some by showing up in their obituary.
4. Earth is a killer theme park. Violent death fuels life. It’s called DEATH WORLD. To eat, you either hire a killer or are a killer or starve to death. The proof is in your die-t. Wether animal corpses, or plant corpses, humans gut, pluck, skin, slice and dice to eat. The living beat the dead until they’re tender, and then bite, rip, chomp and chew. Humans are not the only ones that kill. Mother nature kills humans, exterminates her off-spring, kills her babies. She will reclaim you ass-sets. She will repossess your butt. From birth, nature-mommy raises humans for lunch meat for her micro-organisms that love to feast at the human-body buffet until you’re bare bones. Mommy is a genocidal mass-serial-killer cannibal. Life is a buffet and you are the main course and your children are dessert. Welcome to your warm and fuzzy mother-earth home. Life is a deadly picnic, a fatal smorgasbord. You’re on the menu. You enter crying, screw around making more food, and leave screaming, and end up manure. Enjoy your visit (until you’re dinner).
5. If brainwashing during your suckling years wasn’t enough to drive you nuts, along came your weird relatives and goofy friends spouting their cockamamie opinions and beliefs about life, people, places and things. You might have survived that onslaught, but then came culture, society, schooling, advertising, and Hollywood brandishing their self-serving propaganda. The murder of your mind as a sane thinker was no accident. It was a premeditated conspiracy to turn you into a mindless, obedient, and productive societal drone–and it worked. If you think it did not work, that’s not only proof that it did work, it’s proof why some humans identify as emotional support chickens.
19. A human holding its newborn has questions. Will it be a Republican, Democrat, or serial killer? And what do we do if it doesn’t like cheese cake.
21. Raise up a child in the way it should go (program it) and outwardly it will submit to its parent’s rules while inwardly plotting its revenge or escape–merely holding on until it can drive.
Friday, March 15, 2024
REALITY - BITE YOUR TONGUE
3. If brainwashing during your suckling years wasn’t enough to drive you nuts, along came your weird uncles, crazy aunts, grumpy grandpas and grandmas and goofy friends spouting their cockamamie opinions and beliefs about life, people, places and things. You might have survived that onslaught, but then came culture, society, schooling, advertising, and Hollywood brandishing their self-serving propaganda. The murder of your mind as a sane thinker was no accident. It was a premeditated and preordained and a done-deal-conspiracy to turn you into a mindless, obedient, and productive societal drone–and it worked. If you think it did not work, that’s not only proof that it did work, it’s proof why some humans identify as chickens.
4. Earth is a killer theme park. TORTURE WORLD. violent death fuels life. Don’t kill, don’t eat. If your diet (it’s called die-it for fun) includes animal, or plant corpses, you can kill them or pay someone else to torture them. Humans are butchers. Humans pluck the guts out of their kills (the animals are mostly dead, whereas the murder of plants is at a whole different level) and cook them. Humans pluck plants from their families and skin, dice, slice and broil or boil them ALIVE just to hear them scream. The living pummel the living until they’re tender, and then bit, chomp and chew them. And the next morning, from the rotting leftovers and human poop chutes, they gather the shit up and use it to grow new innocent life that will be totally unaware of their torturous fate. However, it’s not just humans that kill. Mother-earth kills her off-spring, kills her babies (it’s mother’s loving nature). She will repossess your butt. She will reclaim you ass-sets. But first nature-mommy will torture you in ways unimaginable, and you won’t know it is happening. Your murder will be by air, earth, fire, water, boredom, or pest attacks. Or she will use her ravenous tear-you-apart-and-spit-you-out animal kingdom, or she’ll bug you to death one bite at a time, or she will eat you alive with her micro-organisms that love to feed at the human-body buffet until you’re bare bones. Mommy is a genocidal mass-serial-killer cannibal. Life is a buffet and you are the main course and your children are dessert. Welcome to your warm and fuzzy mother-earth home. Life is a picnic, a deadly smorgasbord. You enter crying, you get screwed, and leave screaming, and finally end up manure. “Welcome to life on Earth. May you enjoy your visit, until dinner.”
5. Life created humans and hasn’t stopped laughing. Humans are entertaining. Life created them for its pleasure–the same reason humans make humans, but only eat them when starving.
6. Humans come with an expiration date, like a package of hamburger. Being a temporary human has benefits: Payback may be attempted but not consummated. Your time may run out and you die before you get unlucky. You can avoid baths and stink–folks will just think your past your expiration date and cry while looking at your finances.
7. The purpose of life is not to personally torment and torture you. The purpose of Life is for humans to torture each other–humans call it marriage.
8. Humans don’t always identify as humans. Identifying as something else has consequences. Humans who identify as flies live 25 days. Cats have 9 lives. If you identify as a turtle it comes with a free RV.
9. Life doesn’t care what humans think and believe. You can believe whatever you think (I think life is fun. If I change my thinking, I’ll join a religion).
10. You were born with three amazing abilities, bad breath, body odor and gas. They are your weapons. Learn to use them. They’re the only superpowers you will ever have.
11. You were born with an open, clear, free, unspoiled, unpolluted mind: no thoughts, no beliefs, no faiths, no religion, no theology, philosophy, theory, no biases, prejudices, opinions, no likes and dislikes, and no conclusions, illusions or delusions about life. If you have not analyzed your thoughts and beliefs, you’re a least as nuts as your parents, and nuttier if woke.
12. There are not enough words to explain life, so humans make shit up. It’s called belief. Which is why humans invented the words thingmabob and whatchamacallit.
14. If you wake up in the morning all sucky, and say, “Damn, another day in paradise,” but really mean, “Damn, another day on Sucky World,” your mind has a serious case of LIFE SUCKS. What to do? Focus on when life is in a good mood, like when it wipes out a city so fast that no one knows they’re dead until they realize the light at the end of the tunnel is not a freight train.
15. Men are happy when they hear, “Dinner is ready.” “Let’s play doctor.” Men are walking seed bags looking to start an orchard.
16. For women to be happy they need change. They prefer dollars, but will move furniture for free.
17. Men like adventure. They are attracted to women’s personalities. They never know which one their gonna get.
18. Women put on makeup to get attention. When they get a poor man’s attention, they go home and move furniture.
19. A human holding its newborn has questions. Will it be a Republican, Democrat, or serial killer? And what if it doesn’t like cheese cake.
20. The cure for thinking “Life is not worth living,” is dementia.
21. Raise up a child in the way it should go (program it) and it will submit to its parent’s nonsense until it’s brain starts working (but will feign agreement until they can drive and steal their car).
Wednesday, March 13, 2024
YOUR THOUGHTS
YOUR THOUGHTS
AND
THOUGHTS ABOUT THOUGHTS AND LIFE
1. Your mind is a tool. Don’t be its fool.
2.
I used to let my mind run wild,
Untamed, unruly like a child.
I didn’t know my mind’s a tool
That makes me wise or insane fool.
I started watching every thought,
Banished the harebrained ones I caught.
Mad thoughts that will not leave my mind
I replace with sensible kinds.
Two thoughts at once no one can play
Contrary to what all women say.
3. All humans bring sunshine into a room, some by entering, some by leaving, some by bringing donuts, some by showing up in an obituary.
4. Life created humans and hasn’t stopped laughing. Humans are funny. Humans are entertaining–which is the second reason humans make other humans.
5. Humans come with an expiration date, like a package of hamburger. Being a temporary human has benefits: Payback may be attempted but not consummated. Your time may run out before you get unlucky. You can avoid baths and stink–folks will just think your time is up.
6. The purpose of life is not to personally torment and torture you. The purpose of Life is for humans to torture each other–some call it marriage.
7. Humans don’t always identify as humans. Identifying as something else has consequences. Humans who identify as flies live 25 days. Cats have 9 lives. If you identify as a turtle it comes with a free RV.
8. Life doesn’t care what humans think and believe. You can believe whatever you think. I think life is fun. If I change my thinking, I’ll join a religion.
9. You were born with three amazing abilities, bad breath, body odor and gas. They are your weapons. Learn to use them. They’re the only superpowers you will ever have.
10. You were born with an open, clear, free, unspoiled, unpolluted mind: no thoughts, no beliefs, no faiths, no religion, no theology, philosophy, theory, no biases, prejudices, opinions, no likes and dislikes, and no conclusions, illusions or delusions about life. If you have not analyzed your thoughts and beliefs you might be as nuts as your parents.
11. You don’t have to be a stooge to experience being a stooge. You don’t have to be a flunky to experience being a flunky. You don’t have to be a slave to experience being a slave. If you are not the master of your mind, your mind is your master.
12.
Did your thoughts not help to make
The person that is you?
Of the thoughts you could have thought
who Else but you did choose?
Like a seed your every thought
Produces fruit in kind.
Either you are victim of
Or master of your mind.
13. There are not enough words to explain life, so humans make shit up. It’s called belief. Which is why humans invented the words thingmabob and whatchamacallit.
14. If you wake up in the morning all sucky, and say, “Damn, another day in paradise,” but really mean, “Damn, another day on Sucky World,” your mind has a serious case of LIFE SUCKS. What to do? Focus on when life is in a good mood, like when it wipes out a city so fast that no one knows they’re dead until they realize the light at the end of the tunnel is not a freight train.
15. Thoughts create dramas. Think of your thoughts as free entertainment until they cost you
16. Men are happy when they hear, “Dinner is ready.” “Let’s play doctor.” Men are walking seed bags looking to start an orchard.
17. For women to be happy they need change. They prefer dollars, but will move furniture for free.
18. Men like adventure. They are attracted to women’s personalities. They never know which one their gonna get.
19. Women put on makeup to get attention. When they get a man at attention, they....
20. A human holding its newborn has questions. Will it be a Republican, Democrat, or serial killer? And what if it doesn’t like cheese cake.
21. The cure for thinking “Life is not worth living,” is dementia.
22. Raise up a child in the way it should go (program it) and it will submit to its parent’s ways until it’s brain starts working and it questions its thinking (but will feign agreement even with nonsense as long as it gets free room and board.
23. If humans think clearly, it’s a miracle of nature. If humans think they think clearly, it’s a miracle of programing and indoctrination.
24.
You think it through before you do,
Or you will rue your poison brew,
And have to spew your noxious slew,
And then undo your bugaboo,
Or you’ll be screwed, tied and tattooed,
Because you blew thinking it through.
Monday, March 11, 2024
IN TRO DUC TION
IN TRO DUC TION
Your mind is a fantastic tool. Most humans try to keep their tools clean, repaired, functional and safe. However, humans lose their minds as often as they lose their keys. Sometimes humans venture out without their minds. When they do that, they can’t hear so good, which is why a kind human will raise its voice and yell, “Your out of your mind, dipstick!” (It’s a fact that kind humans sometimes forget people’s names).
Your mind is only as efficient as the information it has. Your mind can only work with the information it has experienced, been fed and digested, which means, crap in, crap out. Your mind may have been weaponized against you. You can tell if your mind likes you or not by the names it calls you.
As you begin to repair your mind by excreting crap, keep in mind that minds do not like to be proven wrong. Most minds invest their very lives in the way they look at life. Often they will defend their crap (knowing its crap) like it doesn’t stink. Minds will even defend their beliefs and faith while knowing full well they don’t actually know whether they’re true or not.
It is possible, but difficult to repair a closed mind. Closed minds get attached, entangled, and identified with their thinking. They latch onto their opinions, biases, prejudices and conclusions as if their thinking about life, is actually life itself.
Open minds are open to experiential experiences that prove things. Open minds can be repaired without hell descending. Open minds are logical, rational and sensible, and will repair themselves as soon as they’re introduced to self-evident truths about humans, earth, and life.
With that said, here are a bunch of truths that may or may not be true. It’s for your brilliant mind to decide what to eat and what to feed to your garbage disposal. Bon Appetite.
(I numbered the thoughts so they wouldn’t think they were connected and sequential, but they’re not. I actually didn’t go to a lot of trouble organizing them because OCPDD minds wouldn’t like that (OCPD is a personality disorder that has an overwhelming need for organization, order, and perfection). I don’t have OCPD. I have SSAO (scatter shit all over).
1. You were born with an open, clear, free, unspoiled and unpolluted mind: no thoughts, no beliefs, no faiths, no religion, no theology, philosophy, theory, no biases, prejudices, opinions, no likes and dislikes, and no conclusions, illusions or delusions about life, but that flew out the window when your parents began programming, indoctrinating, brainwashing propagandizing, conditioning and grooming you to be as nuts as they are.
2. if you have not inventoried and analyzed the thoughts and beliefs you entertain (if you haven’t dumped the bullshit) you are living someone else’s life unconsciously. Congratulations! You are your mom and dad on steroids.
COVER HUMAN MIND REPAIR MANUAL
YOU CAN’T REPAIR A MIND UNTIL IT TAKES A LOOK UNDER THE HOOD. IT MUST LEARN SELF-EVIDENT TRUTHS ABOUT LIFE, EARTH, HUMANS, AND ITSELF, AND WHY IT BECAME A CRYBABY, A YO-YO, AND NUTS. AFTERWARDS,
1. You were born with an open, clear, free, unpolluted mind: no thoughts, no beliefs, no faiths, no religion, no theology, philosophy, theory, no biases, prejudices, opinions, no likes and dislikes, and no conclusions, illusions or delusions about life, but THAT didn’t last long because your parents programmed, indoctrinated, and brainwashed you hoping to create a cooperative mental clone. As a result, if you have not inventoried and analyzed the thoughts and beliefs you entertain (if you haven’t dumped the bullshit) you are living someone else’s life, unconsciously. Congratulations! You are your mom and dad on steroids. Your mind is self-aware. It knows what it is thinking. Your parents indoctrinated your mind, told it you are human, and Have no way life must go and joy is all you’ll ever know.
Life doesn’t care what humans think. Life doesn’t care what humans do. Life doesn’t give a flying hump what humans do to each other, which is obvious since life does nothing to prevent war, torture, murder, rape, kidnaping, robbery, burglaries, carjacking, lawyers, and politicians. And life doesn’t care what humans do to the earth or what earth does to humans–hurricanes, wildfires, earthquakes, tornados, Tsunamis, heat, cold, famine, plague, disease, old age, death and potholes. Life doesn’t exist to please humans. Humans exist to please life. Life likes humans for the same reason humans like adventure, drama and comedy movies. Humans are entertaining. Humans are funny.
2. The purpose of life is not to personally torment and torture you. The purpose of Life is to torment and torture everyone, but not everyone boobs about it. No one likes boobs (exceptions noted).
3. You were born with three amazing abilities, bad breath, body odor and gas. They are your weapons. Learn to use them. They may be the only superpowers you ever have.
4. All humans bring sunshine into a room, some by entering, some by leaving, some by bringing donuts, and some by showing up in an obituary.
5. NOTE: There are not enough words to explain life, earth, and humans accurately, which is why they’re so expensive. (words originated from senses experiencing physicality. Then mind created words to explain physical experiences–mind even created words for wordless experiences: “I saw a thingmabob and whatchamacallit”). And that’s why using words to explain life is so difficult. There’s not enough of them. It would be foolish to think anyone actually understands life, which is why humans make shit up. It’s called belief.
6. Men don’t understand women, but women understand men. The vast majority of men only need to hear two things from women to be happy: “Dinner is ready,” and, “Let’s play doctor” (the order may vary). Pleasing most men is simple because men are simply seeds with legs.
7. Women are not simple. Women need lots of words to be happy, which why men can’t make women happy. Women need excitement, adventure, change, or they’ll move the furniture, dye their hair pink, and make bets with other women to see who can drive their man crazy first.
8. Humans are born with physical, mental and emotional potential and a question mark in their parent’s eyes. New parents have no clue if their off-springs will be Republicans, Democrats, serial killers or if they will even like cheese cake.
9. The cure for thinking that life is not worth living, is to start thinking life is worth living.
Saturday, March 9, 2024
the banned book of life - THOUGHT ZINGERS ABOUT LIFE, EARTH, HUMANS 1-5 finished
the banned book of life - THOUGHT ZINGERS
ABOUT LIFE, EARTH, HUMANS 1-5 finished
These thoughts are an existential threat to insanity. They reflect reality as it is, not reality as conditioned, programmed, brainwashed, propagandized mind’s skew reality in order to feel comfortable with their personal, biased, judgemental, illogical, irrational, nonsensible, absurd beliefs and ridiculous wackadoodle opinions that have been rejected by village idiots in every village around the world since the dawn of liberal insanity’s escape from self-abuse hell. Welcome to the Insane Asylum 2024.
Thoughts have been meticulously and unprecisely disarranged in jumbled random disorder to guarantee mind stimulating brain shocking experiences–just like life. Thoughts are numbered sequentially in no particular order.
1. You were born with three amazing abilities, bad breath, body odor and gas. They are your weapons. Learn to use them. They may be the only superpowers you ever have.
2. The purpose of life is not to personally torment and torture you. Life’s purpose is to torment and torture everyone, but not everyone boobs about it. No one likes boobs (exceptions noted).
3. Life doesn’t care what humans think. Life doesn’t care what humans do. Life doesn’t give a hump what humans do to each other–which is obvious since life does nothing to prevent war, torture, murder, rape, kidnapping, robbery, burglaries, carjacking, lawyers, and politicians. And life doesn’t care what humans do to the earth or what earth does to humans–hurricanes, wildfires, earthquakes, tornadoes, Tsunamis, heat, cold, famine, plague, disease, old age, death and potholes. Life doesn’t exist to please humans. Humans exist to please life because were so entertaining and funny to watch, which is also why humans like cartoons.
4. All humans bring sunshine into a room, some by entering, some by leaving, some by bringing donuts, and some by showing up in an obituary.
5. NOTE: There are not enough words to explain life, earth, and humans accurately, which is why they’re so expensive. (words originated from senses experiencing physicality. Then mind created words to explain physical experiences–mind even created words for wordless experiences: “I saw a thingamabob and whatchamacallit”). And that’s why using words to explain life is so difficult. There’s not enough of them. It would be foolish to think anyone actually understands life, which is why humans make shit up. They are called beliefs.
Friday, March 8, 2024
cover introduction and first 11 thoughts
Because you’re not dead, you have at least one more day to breath and have experiences (some people didn’t make it). If you don’t like breathing and don’t like the experiences you are having, it’s not too late to feed your mind new thoughts so it will stop being a poopoo head.
--------------
I used to let my mind run wild,
Untamed, unruly like a child.
I didn’t know my mind’s a tool
That makes me wise or a fool.
I started watching every thought,
Banished the harebrained ones I caught.
Mad thoughts that will not leave my mind
I replace with weirder kinds.
Two thoughts at once no one can play
Contrary to what your ex did say.
--------------
What follows are thought-zingers, shock-thoughts, and thought-bombs that will change the way your mind currently bitches about humans, earth, and life. Your old conditioning, programming, indoctrination, and brainwashing will be replaced with new conditioning, programming, indoctrination, and brainwashing. Your new mind will be like your old mind, but it will use different words. Afterwards you will experience life, earth, and humans differently (but they will still be weird).
These thoughts have been meticulously and unprecisely disarranged in random and jumbled disorder to guarantee mind stimulating and brain altering experiences (just like life does to you without your permission, approval, and consent–which is also how you got dumped here ). -----------------
1. All humans bring sunshine into a room, some by entering, some by leaving, some by bringing donuts, some by showing up in an obituary.
2. There are not enough words to explain life accurately, so I’m not even going to try. Words originated from senses experiencing physicality. And then mind created words to explain physical experiences. Mind even created words for wordless experiences: “I saw a thingmabob and whatchamacallit.” And that’s why it’s difficult to explain life–not enough words. It would be foolish to think anyone actually understands life, which is why humans make shit up. It’s called belief.
3. Life’s “purpose” is not to personally torment and torture you. Life’s “purpose” is to torment and torture everyone, but not everyone boobs about it (if I remember right, there were a couple at this Cannabis store...).
4. Men don’t understand women, but women understand men. Men only need to hear two words from women to be happy: food, sex (order may vary). When a woman talks, all that men hear is, “blaa, blaa, sex, blaa, blaa, food, blaa, blaa.”
5. Women need lots of words to be happy, which why men can’t make women happy. Women need excitement, adventure, change, or they’ll move the furniture around while your gone.
6. Life doesn’t care what humans think. Life doesn’t care what humans do. Life doesn’t give a flying taco what humans do to each other, and life doesn’t give a smelly outhouse what humans do to the earth–which is obvious, since life does nothing about murder, war, and littering. Life doesn’t exist to please human mind’s needs, wants, and desires. Life creates for its pleasure. And since life created humans, and since life doesn’t care what humans think and do, everything humans think and do is life’s fault (that should make you feel better in a crappy kind of way).
7. You were born with three amazing abilities, bad breath, body odor and gas. They are your weapons. Learn to use them. They may be the only superpowers you ever have.
8. If you think your life isn’t worth living, maybe you’ll get lucky and die screaming.
9. If you have a sour attitude when something doesn’t go your way, your sour attitude will not sweeten your whine.
10. You were born with an open, clear, free, unpolluted mind: no thoughts, no beliefs, no faiths, no religion, no theology, philosophy, theory, no biases, prejudices, opinions, no likes and dislikes, and no conclusions, illusions or delusions about life, but THAT didn’t last long because your parents programmed, indoctrinated, and brainwashed you hoping to create a cooperative mental clone. As a result, if you have not inventoried and analyzed the thoughts and beliefs you entertain (and haven’t dumped the bullshit) you are living someone else’s life, unconsciously. Congratulations! You are your mom and dad on steroids.
11. DO YOU WAKE UP IN THE MORNING AND ENJOY (just) BEING ALIVE, BREATHING AND EXPERIENCING LIFE, or do you wake up in the morning and say, “Damn, another day in paradise,” but really mean, “Damn, another day on this sucky planet!”? If you wake up all sucky, you might have a serious case of LIFE SUCKS. What to do? Keep inhaling. Don’t get depressed. Don’t get paranoid just because life is going to kill you eventually. Focus on pizza, or Chinese food, or Mexican food.
12. Mind is entertaining, as long as you don’t mistake your mind for you. You’re not your mind. Your mind is like an alien with a weird personality, agenda and issues galore. Enjoy its complaining and conniption fits when it has experiences it doesn’t like. when life doesn’t go its way. Don’t engage it when it goes nuts. Instead, relax, release, let go,
Did your thoughts not help to make
The person that is you?
Of the thoughts you could have thought who Else but you did choose?
Like a seed your every thought
Produces fruit in kind.
Either you are victim of
Or master of your mind.
7.
Just think it through before you do,
Or you will rue your poison brew,
And have to spew your noxious slew,
And then undo your bugaboo,
Or you’ll be screwed, tied and tattooed,
Because you blew thinking it through.
8. YOUR THOUGHTS, YOUR LIFE. Change your thoughts, change your life. If you’re enjoying all that is life, but don’t like it, change the thoughts that cause you to enjoy all that is life. Easy-peeezy.
9. If humans think clearly, it’s a miracle of nature. If humans think they think clearly, it’s a miracle of programing and indoctrination.
10. If brainwashing during your suckling years wasn’t enough to drive you nuts, along came your weird uncles, crazy aunts, grumpy grandpas and grandmas and goofy friends spouting their cockamamie opinions and beliefs about life, people, places and things. You might have survived that onslaught, but then came culture, society, schooling, advertising, and Hollywood all brandishing their self-serving propaganda. The murder of your mind as a sane thinker was no accident. It was a premeditated and preordained and a done-deal-conspiracy to turn you into a mindless, obedient, and productive societal drone–and it worked. If you think it did not work, that’s proof that it did.
Wednesday, March 6, 2024
newer back for banned book of life
Since words cannot precisely describe life, I decided to use symbols. Written words are symbols that try to mimic human experiences–very limiting. Humans have experiences that have no human words to describe them. EXAMPLE: I saw a thingmabob whatchamacallit ding-a-thing. It was quivering, jerking up and down like Jell-O with an outer surface like electricity that sparked as it gyrated up the pole until it became a vapor and was sucked into the power lines. I created a symbol (word) for it. I named it, Sparkly-morph-thingmabob-what-the-hell. This book-of-words reveals life as it is–sorta, so it’s rough–so keep an eye out for slivers. With that said, it’s not about belief (which not knowing). It’s about knowing by looking at your own experiences to prove a truth.
If you want to know the truth about life here it is, the primary truth: LIFE DOESN’T CARE WHAT HUMANS DO TO THE EARTH OR EACH OTHER BECAUSE LIFE IS ABOUT HAVING EXPERIENCES, NOT ABOUT PLEASING HUMAN THINKING.
As is life, these thoughts have been meticulously jumbled in random,”DANG! What just happened?.”
1. All humans bring sunshine into a room, some by entering, some by leaving, some by bringing donuts, some by showing up in an obituary.
2. Life’s “purpose” is not to personally torment and torture you. Life’s “purpose” is to torment and torture everyone, but not everyone boobs about it.
3. If you think your life isn’t worth living, maybe you’ll get lucky and die screaming.
4. If you have a sour attitude when something doesn’t go your way, your sour attitude will not sweeten your whine.
5. You were born with three amazing abilities, bad breath, body odor and gas. They are your weapons. Learn to use them. They may be the only superpowers you ever have.
4. You were born with an open, clear, free, unpolluted mind: no thoughts, no beliefs, no faiths, no religion, no theology, philosophy, theory, no biases, prejudices, opinions, no likes and dislikes, and no conclusions, illusions or delusions about life, but THAT didn’t last long because your parents programmed, indoctrinated, and brainwashed you hoping to create a cooperative mental clone. As a result, if you have not inventoried and analyzed the thoughts and beliefs you entertain, you are living someone else’s life, unconsciously. Congratulations. You’re your mom or dad or both.
5. IF YOU DO NOT ENJOY (just) BEING ALIVE AND BREATHING, and you wake up in the morning and say, “Damn, another day in paradise,” but really mean, “Damn, another day in hell,” you might have a serious case of LIFE SUCKS. What to do? Read THE BANNED BOOK OF LIFE. It won’t help, but it makes slick toilet paper.
6.
Did your thoughts not help to make
The person that is you?
Of the thoughts you could have thought who Else but you did choose?
Like a seed your every thought
Produces fruit in kind.
Either you are victim of
Or master of your mind.
7.
Just think it through before you do,
Or you will rue your poison brew,
And have to spew your noxious slew,
And then undo your bugaboo,
Or you’ll be screwed, tied and tattooed,
Because you blew thinking it through.
8. YOUR THOUGHTS, YOUR LIFE. Change your thoughts, change your life. If you’re enjoying all that is life, but don’t like it, change the thoughts that cause you to enjoy all that is life. Easy-peeezy.
9. If humans think clearly, it’s a miracle of nature. If humans think they think clearly, it’s a miracle of programing and indoctrination.
10. If brainwashing during your suckling years wasn’t enough to drive you nuts, along came your weird uncles, crazy aunts, grumpy grandpas and grandmas and goofy friends spouting their cockamamie opinions and beliefs about life, people, places and things. You might have survived that onslaught, but then came culture, society, schooling, advertising, and Hollywood all brandishing their self-serving propaganda. The murder of your mind as a sane thinker was no accident. It was a premeditated and preordained and a done-deal-conspiracy to turn you into a mindless, obedient, and productive societal drone–and it worked. If you think it did not work, that’s proof that it did.
11. Raise up a child in the way it should go (program it) and it will submit to its parent’s ways until it’s brain starts working and it questions its parent’s beliefs, faith, religion, opinions, biases, prejudices and conclusions (but will feign agreement even with nonsense as long as it gets free food, clothes, shelter, and cell phone).
12. REPEAT ALERT: Words are dubious misrepresentations of what reality isn’t enclosed in bubble wrap. Words create conundrums, contradictions, warts, and mental compost. Since I might continue to use words to write this, I know your most excellent mind will sleuth deep meanings from my shallow concepts and instantly grasp my inarticulate thoughts and ideas and translates them into something profound that will magically reveal that all humans are nuts, and most are emotional Yo-yos and crybabies and are only fun to be around when life gives them every bloody nonsensical thing that pops into their uncontrolled monkey minds. The only way to escape your mind’s mental prison, and be happy, is to take control of your mind by not being its flunky. Be the paddle, not the ping-pong ball.
13. If your life is too terrifying; if you’re often afraid, irritated, upset, angry, and hate life much of the time, try this (It works if you work it. However, if you won’t discipline and do it, just think of the horrible experiences you’ll lovingly share with family, friends and co-workers). A. HAVE NO PREFERENCES. B. WHATEVER SHOWS UP IN FRONT OF YOU, DO YOUR BEST FOR THE JOY OF DOING YOUR BEST. C. APPRECIATE EVERY OUTCOME AND RESULT. D. HAVE NO WAY LIFE MUST GO. E. BE THANKFUL BEING ALIVE HAVING EXPERIENCES (write them down, and program your mind by repeating OFTEN, and the rest of your life.
14. Some of these thoughts are easy to understand, others require minuscule effort. Some thoughts are repeated for emphasis. A few thoughts have been re-reciped and re-garnished for consumption for different pallets and tastes. In the end, this snack bar or buffet or smorgasbord of words and thoughts–like food–will most likely have no effect on you if you are thought constipated (unless you change your mental thought diet). Being mentally constipated is a hard and painful life, whereas a diarrhea mind (loosely speaking) is just plain irritating.
15. You got born. You do things. You die. You are a temporary manifestation of life, like T-Rex and the Dodo Bird. Not much mystery there. If you want mystery, check out religion, or create your own theological, philosophical, theoretical abstraction about where you came from, why you are, and where you are going. You will never know if your creation is accurate or true unless you die (though then you might have a ghost of chance) but you can have fun pretending.
16. Humans tend to get all cranky, annoyed, irritated, upset or angry when life doesn’t go their way. They get anxious, stressed, worried, and afraid, and many get so depressed they hunt for something to squash, all because life can be a sticky lollipop. Watching humans throw conniption fits when something didn’t go their way, isn’t pretty, especially if they beat you to it.
17. Humans were born with physical, mental and emotional potential and a question mark in their parent’s eyes. New parents have no clue if their off-springs will be Republicans, Democrats, serial killers or if they will even like cheese cake.
18. Billions of humans are born into thousands of faiths, religions, and belief systems, and many choose one, “Eenie Meenie miney mo.” Belief and faith are powerful aphrodisiacs. Humans tend to defend their beliefs and faith as if they are experiential proven truths. I suppose that could mean that thousands will be disappointed since only a few hundred couldn’t possibly be true, or not. I wish everyone good luck. As for me, “I believe all things but only hold fast to that which proves true,” so basically I know nothing, but that doesn’t stop me from sharing it.
19. Life (people, places, things, your dog, events, situations, circumstances, and the internet) will not always happen or go your way, the way you physically, mentally, and emotionally need, want, and desire. Knowing that, and yet wanting to enjoy all that is life, consider adopting a mind-set that will help you enjoy all that is life. If you want to read the mind-set that will help you enjoy all that is life go back to number 13.
20. Every human wonders what life is all about. Non-religious and religious beliefs and faith keeps everyone wondering. What follows is a non-religious one I’ve been wondering about:
Life is a bunch of projects,
Things to do until dead,
An endless potpourri of hustle and hurry,
A do this, no, do that instead.
I absolutely fathom the secrets of this life.
It’s an endless array of prodigious forays,
A nettling vexation of strife.
And when a long day is over,
After all of my pain,
I go to bed tired, having lost all my fire,
Then wake up and do it again.
I want breakfast, lunch and dinner,
And something between to do,
And then when I die, I’ll give a high-five,
And rot in a plot near you.
21. If you are not dead, you’re OK. If you are dead, you’re REALLY OK. If your mind tells you, you’re not OK, tell your mind to mind its own mind. If you don’t tell it, your mind will drive itself nuts and drag you along screaming. With that said, you are always OK, even if your mind is on blabber-mouth-auto-pilot spouting its nonsensical beliefs, opinions, biases, prejudices and cockamamie conclusions about life without your permission. So with that said, talk to your mind, reason with it. Your mind can be your best friend. It will even help you solve the problems it created when it was a young and ignorant college kid with a degree in Harmonica Cleaning.
22. You were born because two memory chips (egg and sperm) were rambunctiously blended together by two gyrating humans you never met, and never authorized, which resulted in your birth to two total strangers (“HAPPY BIRTHDAY!”). Your body grew from the food your mom ate which means your body is composed of pickles, ice cream and bonbons.
23. Your mind and its thoughts, and the emotions they inflame, are either energy vampires that suck your joy, peace and happiness, or they stimulate and energize your joy, peace and happiness. Who knew that, what you think, stirs what you feel. Your mind creates the soup. Your emotions swallow it. And whether healthy or not, your body enjoys it, or freaks out.
24. Your first breath was a battle-cry, and your last breath will be a sigh, and in-between is mystery, wonder and magic as you spin life’s realities into your own. So mount-up, rise to the challenge, engage the adventure for all you are worth, for in old age and with fond reflection you will realize it was the struggle, the fight and the battle that made life worth living. Yet how serene and joyful you will be if you engaged the wrath of life with a cheerful heart and vanquished your foes with a smile, a chuckle, and a mighty laugh, because by then you will know, life’s insanity was but your own.
25. You may have inherited a body that’s not as healthy, athletic or as pretty as your neighbor’s dog. Don’t panic. Don’t compare. Be awesome, because you are.
26. Expect the best, be at peace with the rest, or “rest in peace” is all the peace you’ll get.
27. You came with personality quirks, disposition, temperament, and attitude. You may not like what you came with. If no one likes what you came with, change. You can do it.
28. Everyone wants to be happy except people who enjoy being miserable. It’s a quirk of nature, but some miserable people enjoy the pity they feel being the most pitied person at a pity party.
29. You are a temporary manifestation of life. Try not to take life too seriously. If you take life too serious, you have a seriously serious case of taking yourself too serious. You can change.
30. Humans leak. They are mostly liquid and have more holes in them than a sponge. Humans spend their whole lives trying to keep themselves from squirting to death just so they can be pickled, dehydrated, or made an ash of in time for their funeral.
31. You only get one body, consider taking care of it in case your life depends on it.
32. Humans come with male or female bodies and mustaches in mysterious places. If a human likes the gender it is not, that’s how it rolls, other humans roll-in-the-hay differently. Try not to be an ass about it.
33. Ninety-nine percent of humans have beliefs about life but are too busy to examine them; 78% are afraid to examine them; 50% don’t care if their beliefs are true; 97% believe that their beliefs are the only true beliefs and everyone else’s beliefs cause rings around Jupiter, and the 1% who have actually experienced and know the truth about life and tell others are hunted down and killed by the 257% who think life isn’t funny.
34. By now you know that from the moment you ejected your prenatal escape pod, your mind was bombarded with the mystical cosmic boondoggle that is earth-life and the nefarious nonsensical absurdities that pass as human thinking. Your electro-plasmic consciousness creates the very delusion you call earth-life which may have mysteriously had its genesis when two lost galactic orgasmic dumpster-divers mistook earth for the perfect place to open an intergalactic bordello.
35. Just because life is a hodgepodge of obfuscation and mystification doesn’t mean you have to stay encumbered by your inane befuddlement about yourself and earth life. Perhaps you’re ready to fly on a genetically modified donkey sired by a delusional unicorn and morph from mental darkness, to Buzz Light, and enter mindless euphoria knowing full well that you really don’t know anything. A closed mind is a closed dumpster reeking pride.
36. Earth-life is a mind-field that generates cosmic comical brain gas, and human thinking is its septic tank. Watch your step. Also, be aware that there are delusional demented popcorn-brains that promote, sell and encourage the putrification and petrification of minds with the goofy idea that feelings, hope, belief, faith and other nonsensical irrelevant and illogical thinking (that prove nothing) are excellent substitutes for experiencing truths. Most humans enjoy their delusional bliss until life proves they’ve been lied to, hoodwinked and bamboozled. Feelings, hope, belief, and faith are TOOLS TO PROVE A THING, NOT SUBSTITUTES FOR A THING.
37. Humans who thinks life should bend over and let them have its way with it (that life must happen their way for them to be happy) hopefully will have an experience that will magically suck the stupid gas right out of their heads and put it where it belongs where the sun don’t shine.
38. Life doesn’t care what you think or do. You can think and do whatever you want, however, watch out for humans–they care, and many are self-appointed enforcers and punishers working for babe karma. If you screw with human created morality, and ethics, they will shun you, holler at you, punch you, jail you, kill you, or worse: give you dirty looks.
39. Life is easy for some humans, difficult for others. How you treat every human is a testament to your misunderstanding or ignorance about life.
Thinking makes real and thinking makes you, you think it, you feel it, then you do.
You take what is and give it a name; you judge what is with a biased brain.
It’s virtuous or vile; it’s good or it’s bad, perhaps your beliefs are driving you mad.
Your angst and your fear, your pain and your dread, surely you know it’s all in your head.
Life is just life unless you believe, it is what it ain’t and then you’re deceived.
The pain you inflict by judging another Is why you’re unloved except by your mother.
40. Humans are endowed with life, liberty, and programmed to chase happiness. All chase, some catch, many bite their own tails. If something can make you happy, the opposite can make you unhappy. Why not just make the decision to be happy regardless of what happens? If you do that , you’re probably not human.
41. Why worry? You came with nothing; you leave with nothing and in between there’s pizza. If you don’t like pizza, no one can help you.
42. If your thoughts are not the master of your fate, and you the master of your thoughts, who or what is?
43. REPEAT ALERT: Where did you come from? Why are you here? Where are you going? What’s the purpose of life? No one knows, everyone guesses, and weird beliefs abound, however, you are proof that life births humans. It is self-evident that at the least, life is action and reaction, cause and effect. At the most, life is every human believing that their beliefs and faith about life are the truth, and everyone else’‘s beliefs and faith are the result of too much prune juice.
44. Life is amazing. Humans are amazing. You are amazing. If the wonder, majesty, and bounty of life has yet to astonish you, you are living in your mind. Get out of your mind and discover the grandeur, splendor and beauty that is life, or stay mind-occupied thinking that your self-created micro-drama-world is the real world.
45. There are as many realities as there are people. Every person lives in his own world. At any moment, I am just one thought away from experiencing a different reality. My life will be the same tomorrow if I think the same thoughts as today. How can I be happy if my thoughts make me miserable? If I want to enjoy the day for what it is (instead of what I think it is) I stop thinking. When I unchain myself from my thoughts, there’s just me experiencing life.
46. If someone or something can decide whether you are happy or unhappy, you are their slave. If someone or something can decide whether you are pleasant or unpleasant, they are your masters. If someone or something can determine how you feel, they control you. They control you because you are not in control of you. You are out of control. You have relinquished the only real power you have: the ability to control your mind, thoughts, and emotions. Why give away your power?
47. Life is life, the rest is a bad attitude, or a good attitude. A bad attitude is throwing gas on yourself, lighting a match, and screaming, “LIFE IS UNFAIR!” Fair, has nothing to do with life. Unfair, is you complaining life screwed you and everyone has to listen to you squawk about it
48. If your life isn’t going your way, maybe you’re going the wrong way.
49. Life is hard. It’s even harder if your ignorant or stupid. Learn to do things well, and things tend to turn out well. “Ignorance never was happiness,” so it ain’t bliss either. You either do life well or you suffer your ignorance, which isn’t a problem if you blame the right person.
50. Life does not exist to please you. If you think otherwise, maybe you should only have children only in case of famine or other emergency.
51. You can be and do and have anything you want. No one will try to stop you except your mind, its programming, your thoughts, beliefs, the grim reaper, and other humans (especially other humans). Did I mention other humans? Well I meant to mention other humans, especially humans that are programmed, indoctrinated, propagandized, and brainwashed to like stewed Sushi.
52. If you want to be happy and enjoy all that is life, do your best, expect the best, accept the rest. Accept the way life and humans do things (things you have no power to influence, change or control). If you do not accept pleasantly the way life and humans do things you will most certainly be someone else’s unpleasantness.
53. You have a choice: Control yourself (your inner-environment, your mind, thoughts, emotions and life energy) or let others control you, push your buttons to please themselves watching raw entertainment when you get pissed-off.
54. If you don’t control yourself, everyone and everything else will be glad to do it for you–and all it will cost you is your independence, liberty, and freedom. The only the thing you have the potential to control one hundred percent is how you feel, and most of that is determined by what you think, and most of that was determined by your ex wife.
55. WHAT YOU WILL BE LIKE WHEN YOU ACCEPT WHAT YOU CANNOT INFLUENCE, CHANGE OR CONTROL: You are carefree, easy-going, easy to get along with, enjoyable to be around; you never get irritated, upset or angry; you never get concerned, worried or afraid; you never get nervous, anxious or stressed; you have no regrets, no likes, no dislikes, no opinions, no biases, no prejudices, no beliefs, make no judgments and draw no conclusions; you are not physically, mentally, and emotionally attached to and not entangled or identified with persons, places or things; you have no physical, mental, emotional needs, wants and desires that must be met to be happy; you have no way that life must go, thus joy is all you ever know, and you always feel pleasant inside no matter how unpleasant it is outside. If you are like that, you should check your pulse. You are dead, not human, drugged, or, you have learned how to control your mind and emotions.
56. If you are inconsiderate of other’s feelings, if you are self-absorbed, and selfish, and if you have to get your way to be pleasant company, your family that left you, and the friends you don’t have, would love to use you as a piñata.
57. You learn by wise counsel or by the things you suffer. Try not to suffer your wisdom.
58. Humans want to enjoy their lives. They seek to live their lives in many ways: survival, comfort, pleasure, pain, challenge, adventure, risk, hazard, and danger. How you want to live your life is up to you. Try to give everyone else the same freedom to mess up their lives.
59. WHAT YOU WILL BE LIKE WHEN YOU FIGHT WHAT YOU CANNOT INFLUENCE, CHANGE OR CONTROL: You get annoyed, irritated, upset or angry when things don’t go your way; you act like a two-year old and cry, pout, sulk, whine or throw a temper tantrum or throw things when you don’t get your way; you think, say and do things that potentially harm you, or others, meaning, you are sometimes illogical, irrational, nonsensical, unrealistic or unreasonable; you get worried, anxious, stressed, afraid or depressed; you complain when life doesn’t meet your physical, mental and emotional needs, wants or desires. You have a way that life must go, thus sorrow is mostly what know . If you are like that, check to see if you are in a mental institution or are a character in a violent video game, because you have given every person you meet, and every place you are in, and everything that happens to you, power and control over your mental and emotional state. You are a puppet, and life pulls your mental and emotional strings. You have not learned to control your mind and emotions.
60. You can either accept what you can’t control, or you can fight what you can’t control. If you accept what you can’t control, you will be the village genius. If you fight what you can’t control, don’t get married.
61. You are bound by the limited reality created by your body’s senses, and your limited mental interpretations. Your thoughts are but stored memories from birth, written on the blank slate of your silly putty mind. What you sense and think are clouded, shrouded and inexact facsimiles of what reality isn’t, which can be made kookier by injecting beliefs.
62. There is more to life on the head of a pin than what passes as reality in your mind. There are dimensions hidden in plain-sight, and out-of-sight, beyond your physical senses–and they interact with the limited, bound and narrow reality you call life. Don’t mentally limit reality. Don’t mentally limit yourself. Free your mind. Identify as a Burrito.
63. TRUTH is the authority. Authority is not the truth.
64. Truth is things as they were, are, and will be when nobody is looking. If someone is looking, it’s subjective truth, subject to the viewer’s senses from place, space, time, and how much booze got swigged.
65. In a universe of infinite vastness, it would be no surprise to learn that life is mindless, is merely a cause and effect, action and reaction chain of cold, uncaring, unimportant, meaningless sequence of events, merely a stage, or a matrix of inconsequential happenings, and when the time comes that the sun and earth and humans disappear as in a flash, their deaths will be as meaningless as were human lives, so if you think you’re a big cheese on the pizza of life, bite yourself.
66. If humans do not pickle their minds in a slew of opinions, biases, prejudices, beliefs and conclusions, their consciousnessess will expand. A human’s limited consciousness can tap into Life’s unlimited Consciousness. A Human’s consciousness can experience Life’s Consciousness. Your bound, limited, finite consciousness can experience life’s unbound, unlimited, infinite consciousness. How? Still your mind, its thoughts, your body, and wait. Enter the stillness of silence, and wait. Don’t give up. Everything is Life, and everything is connected in life. Make the connection consciously by quieting your mind, by emptying your mind, by entering the stillness of silence (you can’t fill a full cup). Empty your mind. Stop thinking, and a whole new dimension of life will open up, and it will be yours to explore. Work on it until you experience the peace that passes all understanding. It will change your life. So will getting a great Dane in your apartment.
67. Almost all human minds are so busy with life, with survival living, that they never consciously experience anything beyond their programmed thinking. By the way, what’s new on Netflix?
68. You can sense things you never knew existed if you clear you mind and senses.
69. Humans who do not examine the content of their minds (thoughts, beliefs, judgements, biases, prejudices, opinions and conclusions) and do not dump their indoctrination, programming, brainwashing, and propaganda, will never be free from their mental and emotional hell-ride, Yo-yo swings and crybaby eruptions. They will never be free from their mental and emotional self-created hell, insane asylum, nut factory, and crybaby prison, and they will live their whole lives in their delusional minds until they are liberated from them when they become something useful: manure for Ragweed.
70. You want to always feel pleasant inside. What’s stopping you from always feeling pleasant and enjoying all that is life? YOU are stopping you. The thoughts your mind entertains and plays without your permission are the problem. Your uncontrolled mind is the problem. It is obvious that your mind and you are the problem because if you were dead you’d have no problems. There are two solutions to your problem. One is, don’t get born. The other one is, just make the decision to enjoy all that is life. It’s just a decision. It’s a mindless-mind-set, like listening to your wife, husband, partner, or rain on a tin roof.
71. Each human life has twists and turns, potholes and bogs. Should our paths cross I will be gentle, kind and loving so that I will not be a pothole in your life. Good luck with that.
72. I live life on the edge of wonderment, not in the depths of despair. I live life enthusiastically. I live on the bright side of life. I refuse to be care-filled, pessimistic, gloomy, despondent or depressed. Stuff happens. People do things. That’s life. I can’t control everything, but I can control my thoughts. I can choose my attitude, and I choose to be optimistic about life on hump day and weekends.
73. There are no mistakes in life, and if you think there are, that’s no mistake. Judging life is like a blind man taking pride in what he doesn’t see.
74. Life is indifferent to human activities, indifferent to human intrigues and machinations. Your indifference to life’s unmanageable, uncontrollable and inevitable executions should be equally indifferent. Be indifferent to life’s indifference while doing you best to make a difference. Walk up to a couple and say, “Now that we’ve had sex, will you introduce me to your wife.”
75. Let’s start at the beginning. Once upon a time there was only life. Over time life morphed into everything: sun, earth, air, water, trees, and bugs. Eventually life transmogrified into a species humans call humans. After that everything pretty much went to shit, except chocolate, which also turns to shit.
76. Either you are in charge of your mind and emotions, or everything and everyone else is. Just make the decision to always feel pleasant inside no matter how unpleasant it is outside. It’s really that simple. Make it a contest. When life gets really unpleasant, see how REALLY PLEASANT you can be. Don’t give up. The rewards for always feeling pleasant are worth it, I mean how often do people think you’re nuts now?
77. Earth-life is a mindless birthing and killing machine, a life and death, cause and effect, action and reaction matrix of violence. Earth life doesn’t give a flying leap if you cleared the cactus or got impaled. Earth life doesn’t care what you do or don’t do, or what happens or doesn’t happen. And you should be thankful for life leaving you alone to enjoy or suffer the consequences of your brilliance.
I used to let my mind run wild,
Untamed, unruly like a child.
I didn’t know my mind’s a tool
That makes me wise or a fool.
I started watching every thought,
Banished the foolish ones I caught.
Base thoughts that will not leave my mind
I replace with other kinds.
Two thoughts at once no one can play
No matter what women may say.
78. Earth is a petri dish that has morphed a species unintelligent enough to destroy its petri dish. Hopefully it doesn’t happen on the weekend.
I used to let my mind run wild,
Untamed, unruly like a child.
I didn’t know my mind’s a tool
That makes me wise or a fool.
I started watching every thought,
Banished the foolish ones I caught.
Base thoughts that will not leave my mind
I replace with other kinds.
Two thoughts at once no one can play
No matter what women may say.
79. Are you a frustrated and troubled soul, filled with worry, fear, and dread? And though among the living you breathe do you walk as if you are dead? Do your shoulders droop and hands hang down? Is mournful your very best smile? And though your mind is ever as nuts, is your heart overflowing with bile? Are you inclined to pity yourself? Is your pillow soaked in tears? Would you even have a life without your misery and fears? The MIRACLE CURE is what you need; with it you’ll no longer whine. It will cure your woe am I looks caused by your I am screwed mind. If perchance in your pain you should ask, “This cure sounds really great; what must I do to profit from it before it is too late?” My answer true, if you please, is this (though you may not feel to do) smile and say a kind word to someone whose woeful as you. Give of yourself and do a kind deed (a secret gift will do) and give among the needy poor, to they who are blessed less than you. And then like sunshine warms a cold day, you will feel in your heart and soul, a glowing light that makes the dark bright and takes away your woes.
80. Don’t give your energy to things beyond your control. Life happens. People do things. That’s life. You can’t control others, but you can control yourself. You can control your reactions to life, and your reactions to others. How you control your reactions to life and others determines your life.
81. You can’t win ‘em all, but you can always be a winner inside by staying pleasant.
82. A closed mind produces a self-made prison-garden of noxious weeds and a wasteland of possibilities crushed. It’s thrilling that human ignorance makes earth-life a spook alley of self-induced consequential terror that keeps earth a boiling, seething cauldron of perplexing mystical impossibilities. Admit it...you like not being bored.
83. Success is not determined by how much wealth, fame, power or education you have in your fridge. You are having a successful life if you feel pleasant and are loved and appreciated by everyone and everything. If you feel pleasant inside and are pleasant outside even when people and life are unpleasant, you are enjoying a successful life, unlike humans who stub their toes or get a paper cut and think hell has descended to personally torment and torture them, and in return, they create hell for everyone within swearing and throwing distance. “You go girl!”
84. If you have a way that life must go, sorrow is what you’ll know. If you have no way that life must go, joy is all you’ll ever know. Have no way that life must go. “Damn I’m out of cigarettes.”
85. Though most humans justify their vanity and pride in the circus mirrors of their own conceit, you just gotta love ‘em. Humans are the spices that make life scrumptiously worth dying for.
86. A free mind is rare, a work of art. Rare, not because it cannot be achieved, but because most humans will not do the work. A free mind, once earned, is cherished and valued more than power, wealth and glory (what has greater value than always feeling pleasant inside–no matter what happens outside–and enjoying all that is life?). Or you can do what most humans do, try to complain your way to happiness (that’s what I’m doing).
When it’s a done deal when it’s a fact,
And you can’t undo it because that’s that,
You have two choices:
You can resist that which you can’t change,
Get upset and angry, condemn and
Cast blame, or you can surrender
To that moment in time
And deal with it pleasantly
With clearness of mind.
87. Since what you think determines much of what your life is like and will be like, try not to give it much thought. It’s not important. Ignore the counsel that, what you think is what you get. Never try to control your mind’s thoughts (nor your emotions from which they spring). Be like most humans who never give a thought to controlling their thoughts–just let the media, government, religions, and schools do it. What could go wrong?
88. Conditional happiness is a semi-upset condition.
89. Happiness–the quest to be happy, joyful, blissful, and ecstatic–is the very reason humans don’t kill themselves. The quest is everything (the having, not so much). Why? I don’t know. Go ask a rich, powerful, famous bored-to-death-the-thrill-is-gone dead person.
90. In an insane society that seeks pleasure by doing and doing and doing, the blissfully content who do nothing, nothing, nothing, are thought insane. Considering the state of the world, if selfish doers stopped doing, then life wouldn’t need so many unselfish doers undoing what selfish doers do. What’s the point? Do whatever the hell you want and reap your reward.
91. If your mind turns sour-puss and pouts when you critique it; if your mind rants and raves and calls you names when you criticize its thinking and beliefs, and if your mind bounces from Jekyll to Hyde when you take a humorous poke at its irrational and diabolical plans to take over your world one brain cell at a time, then maybe it’s time for you to reflect on who is the boss–you, your mind, your genitalia, or mainstream news.
92. The energy that is life is boundless, limitless and infinite, whereas human life, is bound limited and finite. Knowing the difference should give you caution against trusting to your own misunderstanding about life.
93. You may think your thoughts stay in your head, but they don’t. Thoughts vibrate in you and around you and go out from you and they affect everything near you, especially your face (have you looked in the mirror lately). Thoughts are like a tuning fork. The best tunes are the ones that build instead of destroy; lift instead of cast down, encourage instead of depress. Thoughts fuel and ignite feelings and emotions. Try not to blow yourself up.
94. Your goal is not to suffer life but to enjoy life. Your goal is to enjoy life so much that all the miserable people think YOU are the one that’s nuts.
95. You are NOT your mind. Your mind is NOT you. Your mind IS a tool. DON’T BE ITS FOOL.
96. Your mind has a mind of its own. Sometimes it thinks thoughts without your permission–thoughts you don’t like. When you realize you are thinking thoughts that don’t serve your joy, peace, and happiness (or anyone’s) replace them with thoughts that do. Entertain only kind thoughts that serve you and others. Always know what you are thinking. Be the GUARDIAN at the gate of your mind. A tinfoil hat helps. Trust me not.
Do not trust a human mind.
At your best, you too are blind.
Prove everything that you can.
Don’t fall prey to a con-man.
Best intentions can turn foul.
Best be wise or you’ll get screwed.
97. Pleasantness is an inside job, not an outside condition.
98. No one arrives at a destination on a road he did not travel. Where you are today, you traveled the road that took you there. Rich or poor, powerful or powerless, famous or infamous, educated or ignorant, at peace with life or at war, your thoughts were the roadmap that took you there. In the past, you may not have been aware of your destination, but today, you watch the signs–your thoughts–faithfully, as if your happiness depended upon it, which it does. There is no doubt that your thoughts took you to where you are today, and they will take you to where you will be tomorrow. Be the watcher of your thoughts. Be the guardian at the gate of your mind (or take directions from your wife who actually knows how to get there).
99. If you do not watch and control your every thought, word and deed you’re like most humans. You will arrive at the end of your life and blame the wrong human. Words create mental slaves. It’s not called spelling (casting a spell) for nothing.
100. Don’t kick against the pricks of life and people won’t call you a prick.
101. The demanding voice in your head is coming from your untrained mind (whether it’s its own thoughts or thoughts it picked up or thoughts projected to it). Your mind is like a “separate entity” living inside you, and, the “real you” has to deal with it. Your mind was given a name at birth. It is the name you answer to, but the mind is NOT the real you. Your mind only knows what it has learned, its program–and it’s all just memory. Your mind’s job is to follow its program. Your mind is only at peace and happy when working to achieve its programmed objectives and goals. Your mind has an appetite. Your mind seeks to please itself. Your mind always wants more. Your mind loves to rule you. Your mind is demanding. Your mind uses you to satisfy ITSELF. Your mind does not like you when you go against its wishes. Your mind is like an unruly child. Your mind wants what it wants and it will make you miserable if it doesn’t get what it wants, NOW! Your mind gets irritated, upset, angry and violent when you challenge or oppose it. Your mind only cares about you as long as you are its faithful servant. Your mind is egotistical, self-centered, selfish, vain, prideful and arrogant. Your mind is sneaky, conniving, scheming, a con artist, deceptive and a liar. Your mind has a temper and it throws fits and makes scenes to get its way. Your mind broods, frets, worries, gets concerned, anxious, apprehensive, nervous, afraid and has regrets. Your mind sulks, pouts, mopes, stews, brews, whimpers, weeps, cries, balls,
102. Your untrained mind is your master and you are its slave. Humans hate to submit to a dictator, tyrant, or slave-master or an insane boss, but, for some insane reason (only understood by a drunk circus clown) if it is your mind who is your boss and orders you around, you submit like a paid flunky. You jump to obey its demands, thrilled just to satisfy its every need, want and desire as if you are its three wish genie. An uncontrolled mind is a vampire-mind sucking your peace and happiness by treating you as its, stooge, toy, play thing, and all-around loser, and if you let it treat you like that your life will absolutely be worse than living with your mother-in-law.
103. You may be fooling yourself thinking that you are in control of your mind and are using it successfully to pursue happiness, but you don’t realize that when you are unhappy it is caused by the very mind that you think you control. Your unhappiness is proof that you really don’t know what’s going on inside your own head.
104. There is a joy so profound, a peace so serene and a happiness so bright that he who possesses it lives in a different world. If you do not now live in that world, you can enter it by changing the thoughts that created the world you live in today.
105. If it takes a world of peace for you to be at peace you are not ready to live in a world of peace. Anyone who desires peace can be at peace when peace is all there is. When you can walk a war world in peace you can be at peace in any world. If you are waiting for a world at peace before you will be at peace, you wait in vain. Every person is his own world. There can be peace in yours.
106. YOU are the Genie in the lamp. You make the wish and fulfill it. Getting what you wish for is like magic. The universe (life) is “intelligent”. It will respond. Be wise. Be careful. You will get what you wish for, and the consequences.
107. Knife and mind are tools. If a knife has a mind of its own and cuts without permission, it’s dangerous, and so is a mind that thinks without permission.
108. Expect the best, be at peace with the rest, or “rest in peace” is all the peace you’ll get.
109. Free your mind and you will be the joy you seek.
110. What if nothing is important? Thinking something is important is just that, thinking, and thinking something is important doesn’t make it important except you think so. Thinking nothing is important frees you from everything, which leaves nothing, which is important. Thinking nothing is important destroys the ego’s opinions of what is important, which is very freeing and very important to they who think that’s important. Because other people believe certain things are important, I treat them kindly, like I would a child who believes in Santa Claus, and the Easter bunny.
111. Life is this way: If a human is pleasant company, it is welcome company. If it is unpleasant company, its very presence is a magnificent fart.
112. No one has to be like you, think like you, believe like you, act like you, dress like you or have your values. Surely one wonderful you is enough, and for that reason, you value other people’s wonderful individuality. You would be bored to tears if the world had billions of people exactly like your wonderful self.
113. Life did not create unhappy humans. Unhappy humans created unhappy humans.
I used to think I was human,
but my body was acquired.
I experienced I am life,
and this body will expire.
I am not my avatar.
My avatar’s not me.
And you are not your body
that explodes if you don’t pee.
114. Each person does right in his own eyes. You experience life through your eyes, according to your perspective, even as everyone else values their own perspective. Your point of view is no more important to you than another persons is to him. You try to do right in your eyes and everyone else does right in their eyes, and being aware that your sight is less than perfect, you judge less and enjoy life more.
115. Try to enjoy your age. You may never be this old again.
116. Death fuels life. Earth is a death world. You can’t eat if you don’t kill something, anything. If your diet (it’s called “die” it ‘cause yeah got to die “it” before you can eat it) includes dead animals, you can get someone to kill ‘em for you. If you’ve got money, human butchers will pluck the gizzards out of murdered chickens and you can just buy your chicken corpses at a grocery store. If you eat fruits and vegetable you can get someone to rip and tear them out of the ground for you, so you can skin, dice, slice and broil or boil them alive. Yes, the living kill the living and eat them, and from the rotting leftovers grows new life. Mother-earth kills her babies. It’s just Mother’s loving nature. She will reclaim you. You have an expiration date. She will repossess your butt. However, mommy will first kill you in ways you know not (it’s her secret). Maybe your murder will be by, air, earth, fire, water, boredom, or kryptonite. Or, she will use her ravenous tear-you-apart-and-spit-you-out animal kingdom, or she’ll bug you to death one bite at a time, or she will eat you alive with her micro-organisms that love to feed at the human-body buffet until you’re bare bones. Mommy is a genocidal mass-serial-killer and she eats her babies. Life is a buffet and you are the main course and your children are dessert. Welcome to your warm and fuzzy mother-earth home. Life is a picnic. Welcome to the park. You enter crying, leave screaming, and end up manure. No wonder parks are green.
117. In the history of ignorance, no human has ever dodged the consequences of their nonsensical thinking.
118. If you are frequently unhappy, you did it. Life had nothing to do with it.
Do unto others as you want done to you
Is a practical rule that most often proves true.
If you’re selfish and mean, a creep in disguise, May the pain that you suffer open your eyes.
If you’re kind and loving, a saint in the flesh,
The joy that you give is the joy that you get.
CRYBABY DISEASE
A few thoughts about “boohoo” Babies.”
119. PUBLIC NOTICE: Crybaby Anonymous meets every Monday. You can cry, moan, groan, roll on the floor, flail your arms, holler, scream, shriek, throw things, and complain about how life isn’t fair, how life isn’t going your way. As always, the topic at Crybaby Anonymous is, Things That Suck. Specific topics include: Weather that Sucks, and People that Suck. Accidents, illness, disease, old age and death will be cried about. This weeks trophy will go to the whiner with the saddest story, reddest eyes, or whoever brought the most Kleenex.
120. The most common sound of the crybaby species in the wild is, “LIFE SUCKS!”
121. Life is life, the rest is listening to people cry about it, and as if that’s not enough to drive you bonkers, many humans actually have Crybaby Disease. THE SYMPTOM: You freak-out when life doesn’t happen your way. THE CURE: Accept that life will not always happen your way. HOW? Don’t kick a flat tire. Don’t give the flat tire your energy–no thoughts, no emotions. Don’t get irritated, upset or angry. Just fix the freaking tire instead of freaking-out and kicking the freaking tire. Kicking the tire only makes it mad. And if you kick the tire you are as mad as a hatter with a flat tire.
122. Humans are crybabies. Why are humans, crybabies? Your parents began programming you with the sounds of snowflakes melting on an open fire. Immediately after your birth your parents reacted to your midnight mindless shrieking by asking (during the torturous experience) “Remind me why we had this kid?” and then they inadvertently continued to program you to be forever-after a crybaby by catering to your every discomfort, and then, under penalty of law, they were forced to endure you and suffer you until their glorious release from parental prison when you turned forty-five and moved out of your bedroom which they immediately turned into an indoor swimming pool filled with sharks and no warning signs.
123. Life is pain. Being a crybaby is optional.
124. When you were a baby you screamed when you got physically uncomfortable and someone cared for you so you’d be comfortable and shut-up. As a child you cried when you got emotionally uncomfortable and someone indulged you so you’d be satisfied and shut-up. As a youth you belly-ached when you got mentally uncomfortable and someone counseled you so you’d feel gratified and shut-up. As a teenager you complained when you got spiritually uncomfortable and someone guided you so you’d feel at peace and shut-up. And now as an adult you cry, scream, belly-ache and complain when life doesn’t cater to your every nonsensical, ludicrous and silly need, want and desire and everyone wishes you’d shut-up.
125. Life doesn’t care if you cry, scream, belly-ache, complain or go nuts. Life is neutral; life is impersonal; life is unbiased and life doesn’t care what you think it is, or what you think it should be, or what you think it should do. If you are still a programmed-crybaby it is because your conditioning, indoctrination and brainwashing from youth are working, and it can be summed up in this: Most people will not depart from their childhood brainwashing, indoctrination and programming. Which means most humans will not remove their programs of unrealistic and irrational expectations of what life should be and reprogram themselves to accept life for what it actually is, which also means they
126. When a baby is born it gets spanked and cries. Adult crybabies never got over it. They keep on crying and get emotionally louder, and if you spank them, some of them like it.
127. If you act like a two-year old, people will treat you like a two-year old. If you pout, get annoyed, irritated, upset, angry, throw things, roll on the floor and scream, get depressed, despondent, regretful, afraid, and are a miserable self-obsessed foot stomping little shit to be around just because you’re not getting what you want or because life (people, places and things) are not happening your way, you’re living in a circus mirror created by your clown thoughts. If you don’t start controlling your mind and emotions and start appreciating life the way it happens, your misery will be world class ugly. The good news is, at your funeral, your family will only say good things about you, but later, they’ll sigh in relief and say life is more enjoyable with you being dead. Why? Because they will no longer have to walk on eggs and put up with your crybaby whining Yo-yo mad-as-a-hatter bullshit joy sucking-attitude. Change your thoughts, change your ways, change your life (loved ones clapping at your funeral is not a compliment).
128. The U.S.A. is the Crybaby Capital of the World. Everyone accepts the reality that on their worst days all humans are crybabies and yet most humans realize they have to try and deal with each other nicely, or use the only option that always works–murder, which historically is the only thing humans have perfected. However, you might prefer a smile, a laugh and a mighty chuckle and admit that life is nuts, humans are nuts, and crybabies are the devil incarnate when they don’t get their pacifiers.
129. It’s a fact, most humans are crybabies. Crybabies litter the landscape like soiled underwear and you can’t go anywhere without stepping in one, and since hunting them is illegal, they stalk humans.
130. You might be a crybaby if you let your thoughts free-range and feed off your unbridled needs, wants and desires, and you will stay that way until you decide to bridle your self-centered, vain, prideful and egotistical appetites by controlling the thoughts that also make you an obnoxious jerk.
131. A crybaby requires a never-ending supply of pacifiers to be happy, and if it doesn’t get them it will have a toxic emotional meltdown and poison everyone who couldn’t find the door fast enough.
132. There are humans who think everything is a crisis and complain, bellyache, whine and rage through life, and are, for all intents and purposes, professional crybabies who can’t seem to come to grips with the reality that life will not cater to their every fancied need, want and desire, when in fact, compared to many people, they have good lives, great lives, even awesome lives, better lives than the kings and queens of yesteryear and better lives than most people on the planet today. Don’t be a professional crybaby. Do it for free.
133. Dehydration and wrinkles are two symptoms of crybabies. The worst symptom is no blind dates. Crybabies can’t have blind dates because they have no friends that will pawn them off on people that their friends–that they don’t have–don’t like.
134. The most common nut (and the least palatable nut) in the nut bowl of life is the crybaby nut who complains to get what it wants and complains when it gets it. Complainers are joyless energy sucking black holes.
135. If you are a crybaby and want to stop moaning and groaning when not having sex, the military has a cure. They need targets.
136. You can’t make everyone happy, but you can make everyone miserable.
137. You will meet people who turn mean and ugly when they don’t get their way or get what they want. You will work with people who get irritated, upset, angry or violent when life doesn’t meet their expectations. You may even marry a person who turns sour and venomous when vexing things happen to him or her. And you may birth and raise little humans who are never satisfied, who cry, moan and complain and never grow-up. And if that’s you. Congratulations! You’ve developed a unique and cherished talent sought for by no one, which is, to live in hell before you’re dead.
138. You might be a crybaby if your attitude is graveyard depressed and you think life is a smelly dumpster in a greasy alley and you spew a funeral halo and have a decomposing aura. If that is you, then not only is it not fun being you, it’s not fun being near you or doing anything with you (burying you is the exception).
139. A crybaby is like a Yo-yo. One moment it’s up, the next it’s down. A Yo-yo hates experiences that do not fulfill its physical, mental, emotional and spiritual needs, wants and desires, and it gets angry during experiences that do not validate its beliefs, values, opinions, conclusions, and expectations, which means planet earth is a Yo-yo factory.
140. If there were fewer crybabies trolling social events I might go again. When I used to go, and they started complaining and whining, I’d say, “Would you like some cheese with that whine?”
141. People who live with a crybaby have mastered the ability to walk on eggs, which is lucky for crybabies who would otherwise be instant omelets.
142. Being a crybaby is not as bad as being an emotional-drama-pimp. However, of all the energy-vampires, crybabies get more suck per mile than any other suckers.
143. Crybabies have firecrackers for brains and everyone they meet carries a lit match, and if you spark them, they will ignite and explode in a New York minute (3 seconds). When that happens I say, “Please excuse me if I don’t hang around for the fireworks. I have to go throw myself on a cactus.”
144. Most people would rather watch reruns of reruns of bad sequels than watch a crybaby take an emotional dump when it doesn’t get what it wants.
145. If you think people should love you and coddle you for your unstable mental and emotional pimple explosions, you’re not just a crybaby, you’re a looney-tunes character.
146. Homegrown crybabies are not as bad as birthed crybabies. Homegrown crybabies were programmed to fear life. They think life is trying to hurt them and kill them (which it is) thus they are jumpy, nervous, uptight, stressed-out, high-strung and extremely volatile and live on the edge of an always deteriorating cliff that people would push them off if they could get away with it.
147. Crybabies destroy families, friendships, and careers, and then, after destroying their lives, they join Crybaby Anonymous because only other crybabies will suffer their childish, juvenile and destructive behavior, but only if they bring punch and cookies and leave early.
148. You can tell you’re in the presence of a crybaby when you hear its mantra, “Hey...I’m here. Let’s talk about me, about my life. I have needs, wants and desires that need your attention, and I didn’t come here to hear you babble about your inconsequential life.”
149. There are as many varieties of crybabies as there are broken pacifiers, broken homes and destroyed lives, though extreme crybabies don’t notice until they’re six feet under and wondering why people are peeing on their grave.
150. If you are not a crybaby you are worth a million Prozac.
151. Sneaky Crybabies are like Halloween tricker-treaters pretending to be who they are not. It isn’t until after they are in a relationship that they take off their masks and you discover you’ve been tricked and you’re their treat.
152. Whiny Crybabies spray and pollute a room worse than skunk-stink. Whiners dish out disharmony when they pout and mope and sulk. They lack appreciation and are so self-centered they think humans were invented to take them for a walk and pick up their poop.
153. Complaining, fault-finding, negative crybabies, judge and condemn. They walk and talk unfiltered gloom and doom. If it’s your misfortune to run into one (and you will) hopefully its emotional support duck wasn’t hurt; you won’t be as lucky.
154. Mean-Spirited Crybabies are cruel and brutally shrewd. They build themselves up by mentally, emotionally and physically pulling and pushing and tearing you down. They are the dinky dicked bullies on the playground of life.
155. Con Artist Crybabies lack empathy and use their minds, emotions, and bodies to manipulate, trick, scam, bamboozle, deceive, lie and steal. They can’t understand why the people they’ve bamboozled don’t appreciate their free screwing.
156. There are real crybabies and fake crybabies. Real crybabies come with bad-baggage. They arrive here genetically screwed-up. They are prideful, arrogant, self-important, overbearing, insulting, abusive, vain, conceited, in love with themselves too much, egotistical, begrudging, resentful, envious, jealous and greedy (if it wasn’t for all that they’d just be ordinary jerks). Fake crybabies bought into bad-baggage as a way to deal with life. They become narcissistic chamaeleon crybabies and would tarnish lawyers and politicians if it wasn’t too late.
157. Crybabies are unreasonable, irrational and illogical (those are their good points).
158. You don’t want to be a crybaby. You want to be at peace and happy all the time, but you’re not. What’s the problem? You are the problem. Why? Because you have not taken control of your mind, thoughts, emotions, body, and life-energy. Why not? Either you did not know you could, or you do know, but you won’t, and if you won’t, you are why 12 out of 10 people say 150% of humans are nuts.
159. In an insane society, the sane are considered insane.
160. If the universe doesn’t love you, why are there peaches?
I had my heart set on it.
My mind said this way must be.
Then faster than an eagle
Life took it away from me.
I learned from my experiences,
Gained understanding to know,
Life will break the strongest heart
Of a mind that is set in stone.
I now put my heart into it,
But on it my heart’s not set,
And my mind like the eagle
Soars free and without regret.
161. If you refuse to be at peace with the innate and inevitable unpleasantness and discomforts that life inflicts–without your permission–well then, welcome to being at war with life. In the end, guess who wins?
”It is, what it is,”
is what I say,
since life will not always
go my way.
162. Stress has a price. Stress exacts physical, mental and emotional penalties. You pay for stress. It’s not free. There are consequences. How do you stop stressing? Stop expecting life to be different than it is since you can’t change what is because the moment it is, it’s the past and you can’t change the past, so why stress over it. Look forward, not backwards.
I had my heart set on it.
My mind said this way must be.
Then faster than an eagle
Life took it away from me.
I learned from my experiences,
Gained understanding to know,
Life will break the strongest heart
Of a mind that is set in stone.
I now put my heart into it,
But on it my heart’s not set,
And my mind like the eagle
Soars free and without regret.
163. If you’re not at peace with what you have, you won’t be at peace with what you get.
164. If you order a Chocolate Carmel Double Foam Shaved Iced pickle Latte and get a Triple Onion Garlic spiked coffee, and you go insultingly ballistic, you obviously don’t like root beer. But the best part for your audience is, you’ve just exhibited and paraded your uncontrolled mind and emotions for everyone to see and laugh at (entertainment like that is sad, but priceless).
165. Life is life, the rest is attitude, and if you take life personally or make it personal you’ve traded the reality that is, for the reality you created in your mind, which makes you the author of your misery. The good news is, when you die, they bury your misery creating attitude with you so you can enjoy it on the other side of you don’t believe in reincarnation.
166. Life is half pain and half pleasure. If you can’t enjoy the pain, half your life will be sorrow.
167. When things happen that you don’t like, just say, “It is what it is,” (don’t do the “Boohoo... WaaWaa... I’m screwed... poor me, life sucks!” thing). Accept what is. Accept life for what it is; deal with it; get over it and move on and continue to live your life. No one likes crybabies except Kleenex stockholders.
168. To earth your bound, your journey to commence. Take with you this dictum sound into a world of recompense: How you view the world, is your world.
169. There may be value in outward expressions of irritation, upset, and anger in order to teach, or get things done, but, there is no value in being inwardly irritated, upset or angry. Control your thoughts. Control your emotions. Both are tools, but fools are ruled, by those tools. Don’t be a fool. You can be outraged, without getting enraged.
170. I appreciate what I have, and don’t complain about what I don’t have. I appreciate what I can do, and don’t complain about what I can’t do. Whatever I focus my attention on, increases. Whatever thoughts I entertain attracts more of the same. What I complain about, increases. What I am thankful for, increases. I decide what to think and talk about, and thereby affect those things.
171. I have the benefits that come with receiving all things with thankfulness, and not the detriments that come from complaining about everything.
172. Worry, fret, and stress are signs you are a self-abusing control freak whose imagined fears could trigger the bullet you are trying to dodge.
173. You are flexible when dealing with life so that you will not get bent out of shape when people and earth do what they do without your permission...again. Being flexible makes life easier and it makes you less twisted.
174. Nothing in life is negative or positive unless you think so, and then it is so....for you. You cannot think something is positive without thinking the opposite is negative. There are no one-sided coins. You cannot have up, without down. Thinking positive, or negative divides reality into something it isn’t. Reality is what it is (well it was until humans were invented, and decided that negative stuff is a letdown, and positive stuff is orgasmic).
175. If you draw conclusions, have opinions and judge life you will learn that you are not as smart as you think you are. Why? Because you keep changing your opinions, conclusions and judgements about life, which means, your previous thoughts have become clown thoughts, which means your future thoughts may well be you, still playing the clown.
176. I plan my day and work my plan, but some days, the day has its own plans, and those days were some of my best days. Sometimes surrendering to the day is the best way to have the most enjoyable day.
177. Opportunity to learn and expand, to test oneself, adventure-into-the-unknown, mystery, suspense, excitement, chance, fortune, luck, gamble, challenge, risk, hazard and danger, are the spices-of-life that make life worth living, and in the end, you’re gonna die anyway, so go for it, give it all you’ve got, or do the next best thing, die a couch-potato.
178. What is YOUR purpose in life? Choose one, and that’s your purpose. What is THE purpose of life? There are over a thousand philosophical, metaphysical, New Age and theological beliefs each claiming to be the one and only true circus. You can wear any clown outfit you like.
179. Life was what it was; life is what it is; life will be what it will be. There is no value in regretting what was, getting mad about what is, or being anxious, worried or afraid about what isn’t (your future). Regret, anxiety, worry, and fear are debilitating mental energies that vex the mind and make living a plague and kills joy, peace, happiness and your last bottle of Vodka trying to get happy, which means everyone’s screwed when you get back to your sober miserable self.
180. What I thought is what I got and what I got I thought. Wise am I if I don’t blame an outside cause that’s not.
181. If your quest in life is not joy, peace, happiness and pleasure then perhaps it’s sorrow, fear, sadness and pain. Since very few people are on a quest for pain, how come so many people experience it? If you experience pain you are not in charge of your mind and emotions. A person WHO IS IN CHARGE OF HIS MIND AND EMOTIONS EXPERIENCES NO MENTAL OR EMOTIONAL PAIN.
182. Humans take great pride in their accomplishments, but in truth, humans did not design themselves. They were born with physical, mental, emotional and character attributes–humans arrived programed. They did not give themselves their stature, looks, gender, health, intelligence, personality, emotions, attitude, determination, tenacity, willpower, talents, strengths, and weaknesses. And if by chance, you are a strutting cocky peacock about your awesomeness (while putting-down others) you’re definitely a self-centered moron. In addition, you also did not determine your birth circumstances, not the time, the place, the family, the religion, the culture and the society you were nurtured and raised in, so.... again, in truth, your pride is misplaced, your vanity is a mental illness and your egotistical moronic chest thumping is a special kind of stupid.
183. What you FEEL when not thinking, when not interpreting or fighting life, is PEACE.
184. Every experience you have only has the energy you bring to it and put into it, and... when you have experiences you dislike or hate, your attitude about them determine what else you create.
185. If liberation is your ultimate goal in life, you are liberated when you are at peace, happy, joyful, blissed-out and ecstatic no matter what happens; you are liberated when life does not have to happen your way; you are liberated when you have no expectations that must be met, when nothing bothers you; you are liberated when you are at peace whether you eat or not; healthy or not, live or not. You are liberated when you need nothing (needing pizza doesn’t count).
186. There’s nothing wrong with getting irritated, upset, angry, violent or throwing a raging hissy-fit that a good heart-attack or human-attack can’t cure in a micro-second. And remember, if you hang around angry people, you are nuts, and if you are angry “people,” you are the plague everyone needs to avoid like the plague.
187. You can’t know up if you haven’t been down, and you don’t know square if there’s no round, surely you know this is true. You know pleasure because you know pain, and you know loss because you know gain, which makes you nobody’s fool.
188. Life will mess with your expectations. It may deny you your needs, wants and cherished desires. If you set your heart unequivocally on the outcome of your expectations, life will break your heart. Don’t do it. Have expectations, but be at peace with the outcome (outcome is like having a baby. You don’t know what it’s gonna be like, but you change it’s diaper anyway).
189. If you were dead, would people’s lives be more joyful? Do family and friends run when they see you coming? When you enter a room does everyone suddenly have to go to the bathroom? And they never return? If so, you have either become an unthankful, ungrateful, never satisfied sourpuss, complaining needy crybaby, or a backstabbing, prideful, vain, self-aggrandizing selfish narcissistic ego-maniac who thinks life is about me, me, me. If people run when they see you coming, it’s not a marathon, but you’re still not invited.
190. Knowing a thing is not the same as doing a thing. To take charge of your life you must take charge of your mind which takes practice and repetition, and, and, and if you really want to enjoy life more, you will keep practicing. You will keep practicing. You will not give up. You will keep practicing until you conquer your mind, until you are the jealous watcher and gatekeeper of your mind and its thoughts and the master of your life.
191. Is it fun being you? Is it fun being with you? It is if you have a sunny disposition. It isn’t fun being you or being with you if you have a dark disposition or if you have any other emotionally thought-caused mental disease or plague which cause you to be a joy destroying pestilence of Biblical magnitude. Or if you’re just mean.
192. If you were for sale would anyone buy you? How much would you pay for you? If the people who know you could sell you, how much would they ask? He pouts; she sulks; he mopes and she boobs and then he gets irritated, upset, angry or violent when things don’t go her or his way. He is prideful, egotistical, self-centered, vain, selfish, greedy, unappreciative, unthankful, quarrelsome, depressed, seldom satisfied, difficult to please, stressed, needy and a can’t be trusted backstabbing whiny uptight bundle of fun to be around when asleep, in a coma or dead. FOR SALE: “I’ll give you a hundred bucks to haul him or her to the dump.” ON THE OTHER HAND, He smiles; she laughs; he grins and she jokes and he never gets irritated, upset, angry or violent when things don’t go her or his way. He is kind, caring, helpful, cheerful, generous, charitable, calm and at peace, enthusiastic, upbeat, positive, pleasant, fun to be around, easygoing, undemanding, congenial, thankful, appreciative and lives on the bright-side of life (most crybabies want to kill people like that). NOT FOR SALE: Priceless.
193. If it’s conditional, it ain’t love. “I love you...if you obey these conditions...” Conditional love is self-serving. It serves a person’s personal needs, wants and desires. If it’s conditional, it’s self-love, and it has no respect for another person’s individuality. Ultimately, love is respecting people’s individuality, their liberty, and the nature of life and the power which sustains it.
194. The earth will never satisfy your every desire; never fulfill your every want; never meet your every need; never grant your every wish; never match your every expectation; never agree with your every thought; never submit to your every opinion, and never bow to your every judgement, but it will take you unawares, attack you and spit you out on the razor edge of your fears. Though people may plan, work and accomplish many wonderful things, earth’s nature and the nature of some humans always try to destroy what others have created. The earth is a beautiful and a marvelous resource and people are often noble and self-sacrificing, yet in an instant, the earth can turn violent and take back its resources and humans can turn vicious and descend into greed. Thus by nature’s storms and the selfish nature in some humans, the world is bathed in blood and tears.
195. Do not entertain, do not ponder, and do not play with thoughts that destroy your joy, peace, and happiness.
196. Earth life is a struggle for survival in a world where nothing comes easy and all things have a price. Between birth and death, you experience disease, accidents, violence, and loss. Your actions and the actions of others create conundrums that complicate your days and vex your nights. From rising to setting sun each day is commotion, turmoil, and uncertainty. You hope, desire and plan, but in a sudden turn of events your hopes may be crushed, your desires may go unfulfilled and your plans may be ruined. As your world disintegrates around you, you realize that many things in life are beyond your control. If the truth were known, you spend many of your days in sorrow even as you hope your future will be endless joy. Yet as time passes, you accept that life is a seething cauldron of perplexities, an overflowing crucible of endless troubles and that change is the only constant.
197. Life is pain. Stuff happens. People do things. Get used to it. Get over it. Better still, appreciate it. See the value. See the benefit. If you won’t do that, at least look at life as an adventure and rise to the challenge, or you can look at life like it’s a sour, rotten, smelly, putrid shit trip only to be outdone by your sour, rotten, smelly, putrid shitty disposition. Nice thing is, after awhile, no one will notice, why? Because no one will be around you.
198. If you think your “normal” ego is trouble, wait until you meet your Ogre. He’s in there. He’s bad. And he eats his prisoners. Don’t wake him. DON’T BE AN OGRE. An Ogre is a human ego gone mad. The human ego can turn Ogre faster than the speed of darkness.
199. In mythology, ogres are disgusting, cruel and monstrous fiends. In real life, an ego turned ogre, exploits and brutalizes its victims. Ogres are slaves to their needs, wants and desires. They are seldom satisfied. They are seldom at peace, are implacable, always on the hunt, merciless and bloody. They get easily offended, irritated, upset, angry and violent when they don’t get their way or don’t get what they want. Sounds human, doesn’t it? It sounds human because it is human. Man’s base nature is a crabby self-destructive ogre. It is the ego that gets programmed, conditioned, indoctrinated and brain-washed from youth, and it can turn ogre like a bull seeing red. An ogre is the enemy of your peace. An ogre is the one that commits suicide. An ogre wages war because it is at war with itself. An ogre is an empty container, an empty vessel that needs to be filled constantly, usually at the expense of everyone else. An ogre can never fill its own emptiness. An ogre is egotistical and has a puffed-up opinion of himself. An ogre’s thoughts are selfishly-self-centered. Its thoughts are based in pride, vanity and greed. Ogres are egos gone mad. To some degree, they are the insanity that is in all men but only in two women at last count (the poll was conducted by women).
200. Your battle for sanity is between you and your ogre. An ogre changes by suffering the consequences of its thoughts and actions. It learns to think better thoughts and thereby gets happier results. If you are not happy with much of your life, or life in general, it’s very likely your ego-ogre-mind “hates” you, which is self-evident if your mind feeds you thoughts that are the enemy of your joy, peace, and happiness.
201. If you want to get even with or torment your vampire-ego-ogre-mind or if you want to discover its true nature, deny it a cherished need, want or desire. Try not eating for ten days. It will rise to the challenge. At first, it will dismiss your idea, hoping you’re not serious. If it thinks you are serious, it will denounce your efforts and point out all the reasons why it’s a bad idea. If you persist, it will plead with you, and if that doesn’t work, it will call you names not even heard at a sailor’s convention. If you still persist, it will get serious, and that’s when all hell breaks loose and you’ll discover what a delightful devil it can be and just exactly who's going to be boss. Show it who is boss. And beware of its many voices. Especially the voice that tells you it’s OK to go on a beer diet as long as you drink and smoke while practicing road-rage.
202. Your vampire mind sucks. It will bleed you dry and leave you at a buzzard picnic. An energy-vampire-mind will kill you and never complain about its own suicide. A vampire mind is an untrained mind that lives in the darkness of its unrestrained desires, and, it loves to bite the hands that feeds it–your hand–and drain your life force, and kill both of you.
203. Everything was going fine. Life was good for Jack, and then in an instant his world crashed, burned, exploded and disappeared in a vapor of black smoke because he went berserk. Days later when he thought about what he had done, Jack realized that it wasn’t by chance. He had reacted without thinking. He knew that his response was the fruit of the thoughts he had been thinking most of his life (there are no details in this story because the details vary from person to person, but the results are the same, lives turned upside down or destroyed). This could happen to you....may have already happened to you. Raging or going berserk never resolves problems in your favor. Whether it’s a minor situation or a monster event, your reaction to them may determine whether you get what you want or get what someone else thinks you deserve. Don’t do the berserk thingee.
204. Manage your inner-world, and your outer world is your playground.
205. A plane carrying two guys crashes on a snow-topped hill. To their surprise, they are alive ‘cause neither got too killed. One takes a broken wing and skis a most awesome drift. Other gets mad, not at all glad, enraged he falls off a cliff (perspective is everything).
206. Brother and sister going to visit their dying pop. Their car breaks down, makes a loud sound, comes to a grumbling stop. The car gets fixed and purring, but at hospital too late. Sister depressed, failed-heart is the guess, exits to the pearly gates (stress kills).
207. I relive my nightmares and regret my every fling. Dumb thing to do, just makes me blue, ‘cause it don’t change a thing. Yes, life is a potpourri, mixture of pleasure and pain. Pity and regret double the stress, cause mind and body to strain (thoughts affect health).
208. I once had a lot of friends, family that loved me too. But I complain about my pain, they avoid me ’cause I do. I get upset and angry and irritable as well. Argue a lot, fight on the spot, my life is a living hell (thoughts and their results affect relationships).
209. If you are bored with life it is because you will not leave your comfort zone. The biggest challenge in your life is you. Playing it safe may mean you live a longer boring life.
210. Little things bug little people. Most people handle big natural disasters quite well, on-the-other-hand, little things, daily little things, like relationships, challenge most people to their limits. What hurts a relationship most is what people say or don’t say and how they react and respond to each other. Letting your mind lose its peace, its cool; get its panties in a bind, get it feathers ruffled; stress-out; go ballistic and flip-out creates deadly blowback that results in broken hearts, mental, emotional and physical problems and destroys lives more than any disasters except a bad hairdo.
211. If there was a way to be in charge of your life without being in charge of your mind, its thoughts, and the emotions they fire up, the government would have discovered it by now and taxed it or outlawed it. Oops! Too late.
212. To be the master of your thoughts and create the life you want you must be the guardian at the gate of your mind. You must monitor your thoughts each moment you are awake and replace debilitating, destructive, judgmental and pessimistic thoughts with enabling, constructive, loving and optimistic thoughts until they close the casket on your avatar.
213. If you ever think you’re important, and life can’t do without you, visit a graveyard.
214. You are not a physical being. You live in, you occupy a physical being. You took up residence in a temporary physical vehicle when it was born. You acquired a body. You are not the body. You have an avatar. You are not a avatar. You do not have physical, mental, emotional needs, wants desires, your avatar does. Pay attention to your body. Pay attention to its mind, its thoughts, its emotions, its energy, so you know what is going on, so you know what it is thinking and feeling. Since you are not your vehicle, do not become identified, attached or entangled with your vehicle. Your avatar is temporary. You are not. Your avatar is finite. You are infinite. Your avatar is bound. You are boundless. Your avatar is limited. You are unlimited. Instead of suffering your vehicle, enjoy it. Enjoy its physical, mental, emotional abilities, its ways of thinking and doing. Become the observer, the watcher of your avatar. Talk to your mind. Talk to your body. Talk to your emotions. You are a temporary occupant inside a vehicle. Are you the boss of your vehicle, or is your vehicle the boss of you. Who bosses who around? If you do not take charge of your vehicle, you’re joy riding. You’re just along for the ride. If you take charge of your vehicle, if you take control, your vehicle will respond; your vehicle will acquiesce to your will; it will change according to your vision. Your vehicle knows it has a time limit, that it will die, so it goes after all the pleasures available. Not all vehicles are the same. Some are lazy, some are magnificently self-indulgent, selfish, vain, prideful, egotistical, some love power, wealth and glory, some are kind and benevolent. Your vehicle comes from a genetic line. You can see its ancestors on its face, body, the way it thinks, its emotions, intelligence, personality, even some of its genetic likes and dislikes, it’s fears and aversions, its propensities, talents, abilities. Your vehicle is the embodiment of all its ancestors. You are not your vehicle. You entered a physical vehicle to experience physical life. What you do with it is up to you (if you take charge and take control). If you don’t, or won’t, that of course is up to you, but it comes at a price. The price is the absence of continual joy, peace and happiness, because, your avatar isn’t nearly as smart as you are. What are you? You are LIFE ITSELF, in an avatar.
215. There are many things in life you cannot control. Your thoughts are not one of them. Until you stop crying about what your life isn’t and starting enjoying what your life is, you will be miserable every time life doesn’t go your way. There are thoughts worth thinking and thoughts worth dumping. Most humans need a really big dumpster to dump their really big dumb thoughts. It’s not the thoughts that run through your mind that create problems. It’s the thoughts you empower by entertaining, playing and toying with that cause your problems.
216. Some people challenge themselves with formal education, business, politics, sports or conquering a neighborhood or country, but there is no greater challenge than to conquer yourself, to conquer your mind, and there are no greater rewards or benefits.
217. When people tell you they have problems, they are not talking about the real world (though that’s what they think). What they are talking about is their inner-world of thoughts. With their thoughts they have labeled what is going on in the real world as difficulties, hardships, and problems, and, having so labeled them with their thinking, it’s the truth, for them, and for them only. Whatever label you give to your experiences, is your reality (this truth is evident when two people have the same experience but place different labels on them). One person calls his experiences adventures and opportunities and enjoys them while another person labels his experiences as troubles and problems and is miserable. When you stop looking at your experiences and circumstances as problems and view them as adventures, your life will change, “...and they lived happily ever after”.
218. What you think is true, has great power over you, and belief as well can make your life a living hell, or heaven on earth, depending upon your mirth. Your thoughts and beliefs feed your joy or your grief.
219. I used to be good looking, but I prematurely aged. These old age spots are awful thoughts, I think I am their slave. And now a final thought before I go away: life is real grand or a migraine head-slam, depending on what my thoughts say (perspective and attitude are everything).
220. If you complain you are insane. Complaining doesn’t make sense. It’s illogical, irrational, unreasonable and a waste of time because it doesn’t accomplish anything except to raise your blood pressure and kill you, which is only beneficial for people who don’t like you. Don’t make their day. Complaining has physical, mental, emotional and spiritual benefits people are still hunting for. Complaining fouls the air around you and is unpalatable. Complainers have lots of friends who never visit them. Complaining and misery live in the same house, and it’s a hell house– living death. A lot of people enjoy complaining. It’s free entertainment and worth every penny.
221. Gripping, bellyaching, squawking and bitching about something that happened in the past (you were born) is happening (you’re slowly decomposing) or will definitely happen (your eyeballs will grow hair) is loony, loopy and nuts. What value does it have? And if you complain about what might happen, you are certifiably nuts, but you can become a youtube sensation.
222. It is NOT complaining when you point out problems that need solutions or give constructive criticism–however, it is complaining if you do it to demean, debase or ridicule people. Don’t complain. It stinks worse than a shit load of shit.
223. If you are suffering it’s because your thoughts are at odds with what is happening. If life isn’t going your way, maybe you’re going the wrong way.
224. If I am blue, boohoo or sad and can’t seem to find my glad, I name again my blessings sure and then I am woeful no more. It’s my thought, not my circumstance that causes me to slouch or dance. I am aware, compare my place in the life of the human race, and realize I could be off worse if I were mulching in a hearse.
225. As simple as it sounds, the cause of your unhappiness is also the cure. Thoughts are the cause and thoughts are the cure. Thoughts cause misery or happiness.
226. If your misery makes you happy there’s nothing wrong with you, so you’re good to go. If complaining is your joy, go for it. If discord and strife is your peace, strive on. If you think life should be a miserable experience, be its guest (and may your consequences rest easy on you as you enjoy your wonderful alone life).
227. If I have thoughts I do not like I tell them to take a hike. I think thoughts that inspire, avoid the ones that stir my fire. Mean thoughts create mean words, better that they’re never heard. Some thoughts might make me mad; I don’t think them, keeps me glad. I think thoughts that make me smile, keep them in my mental file. If kind and loving thoughts I do, I’m always happy, never blue. I live life the way I think, in peaceful joyful wonderment.
228. Your mind can only entertain one thought at a time. So the key to your peace (when something happens that frustrates you) is to replace a “Life sucks!” thought, with, “Yeah, I know, my leg fell off; so does this peg-leg make me look fat?” Of course, you don’t have to be at peace with your new one-legged reality. Instead, you can turn your life into a complaining, sulking, depressing whine-fest. Since your mind can only think one thought at a time, why not make it think pleasurable thoughts, instead of tormenting thoughts?
229. I am free to do what I want at the price of consequences. It is self-evident that I am free to think, believe, say, be, and do whatever I have a mind to. If I am good at running, weaving, dodging and circumventing the consequences for something I did, my new consequences are running, weaving and dodging. “Wait, that’s not what I wanted!” Oops! Welcome to the new life your thoughts and actions created.
230. Every day is a good day to die. If you are afraid to die, you are afraid to live. Whatever you fear, that is your prison. Today is a good day to die and a good day to live without the fear of dying. Refuse to be afraid. Refuse to live life in a prison of fear. You are free to embrace life fully, to challenge life and yourself, to walk into the dark of the unknown and bask in the light of adventure. No one lives forever and no one knows the day of his dying. If you fear your dying day (knowing not its schedule) you will fear every day. Life is for living, not dying. Let the day of your dying wait its turn, and when it comes, embrace it like an old friend returning to greet you for your “next adventure”.
231. The most valuable work you will ever do is in your mind. Many of the things that show up as your life began in your head. Everything that you think is important and everything that you value and everything that you appreciate is the direct result of the work you have done in your mind. All your likes and dislikes, all your needs, wants and desires, and all your goals and ambitions are the result of what you think, how you think about yourself, people, places and things. Every aspect of your life is subject to your thoughts. Nothing passes through your mind that you don’t eventually become aware of. Why? Because what you think shows up as your life. If you’ve ever wondered, “How did I get here?” Ask your mind that question. It will tell all about the weird stuff you’ve been feeding it.
232. If you are ill, sick, diseased, disabled or dead; if you are in danger; if your spouse leaves you or cheats on you; if you lose your job, career or business; if you came in last in the spitting contest; if you are homeless, hungry, destitute, enslaved or without cell service; if you are unappreciated, unloved, have no one to love, are alone and lonely, get no respect, are hated; if your life is empty of challenging and stimulating experiences; if you have not accomplished anything; if you are robbed, burglarized, in an accident or your toilet backs up and soaks your butt or you’ve been attacked and are bleeding to death and don’t know where your cell phone is, hopefully you will think, “Life didn’t cheat me, it gave me the adventure I paid for. Thank you.”
233. Are your views not different today than yesterday? Perhaps they will be different tomorrow as well. Has there not been a time when you thought you were right and later found out you were wrong and laughed at your perception? Will there never again come a time when you will laugh at yourself? Yes, you will laugh, for your knowledge and understanding increases each day and your views will change in days to come. You are on an amazing journey of self-discovery, so you will not hold fast to today’s thoughts about things, for tomorrow you may be laughing at yourself, and truly, you will enjoy the laugh. As to others, are they not also on a journey of discovery? Yes, so you will laugh with them, but never at them. You will always be their joy and never their sorrow. Wisdom says, only laugh at yourself and you won’t get a black eye.
234. Humans tend to have a herd mentality. They have herd values, herd cultures, and herd norms. Because of that, it is an udderly undocile and dangerous undertaking to buck the herd. If you turn on the herd and feed them new ideas they may turn on you and stampede and trample you, or they may take away your grazing-rights. Herds are not bully about ideas that discombobulate their narrow interests. Hobnobbing herds with strong political, ethnic, cultural and religious beliefs must be approached with extreme caution. It is often best to leave them alone to continue feeding on their accepted common fodder.
235. I passed beyond the world today, crossed to the other side, and walked among the living there who recently had died. There are no frowns, no furrowed brows, no worries and no fears. There are no lonely hearts yearning to return to here. They’re happy there, their joy is full, with family and with friends, and meadows green and clear blue skies and peace that never ends. In loving memory they recall, with fondness they embrace, their journey in a troubled world among the human race. Those days are done, no trials now, no more hearts of stone, for all is love and love is all in that eternal home (true or false? If true, you’ll know when you die. If false, you’ll never know).
236. The only thing you can totally control in life is your inner-state of being. Who in their right mind would GIVE THAT POWER AWAY?
237. You are special and exceptional. In all the universe there is just one you. Yes, you are a sole-original-non-duplicated-solitary-one-of-a-kind-singularly-exclusive unique being. Obviously, you are in a category of your own all by yourself, and if that is not exceptionally special, what is? The universe went to a lot of effort forming billions of exceptional and special people just like you, but of course, no one is exactly like you but you, which makes you an exceptional and special you.
238. You are what you think, which is why there’s only one of you. You are what you think, which is why you feel like you do. You are what you think, which is why you believe that way. You are what you think, which is why you say what you say. You are what you think, which is why you like or dislike that. You are what you think, which is why you act the way you act. You are what you think, which is why you smile or why you frown. You are what you think, which is why you are up and sometimes down. You can choose what you think but you can’t choose the consequence which makes what you think the most important thing in the world because what you think makes your world.
239. I accept every human’s right to be free, even as I want others to accept my right to be free. I do not judge humans with my teeny-tiny-mini-micro-bikini-reptilian brain, because I do not want to be judged by that freaky brain.
240. Where does your mind spend its time? Two men on a beach watch the sunrise. One says, “See how the sun glows and shimmers. It’s like a Christmas ornament. I can’t tell if the ocean is sinking or the sun is rising. What a marvelous nature show.” He then turns to his friend and asks, “What do you think?” The friend keeps looking at the sun and says, “I’m not thinking about the sun rising. I’m experiencing the sun rising.” Sensing the moment is different than thinking the moment. When you are thinking you hardly notice the day. It vanishes, almost as if it had never been, and unnoticed and gone are many years as if in an instant, and hardly are you able to recall them. Too much thinking and not enough sensing makes invisible the simple joys of life. Think less, experience more.
241. You are healthy and getting younger every day. You are in excellent health. When you look in the mirror you look awesome; you are invincible; you are brilliant; you are inspired; nothing can stop you. You are on top of the world, first-class, par-none, a home-run, grand-slam and touch-down rolled into a package called you. You are the inspiration you need. You are your biggest fan. You are your own cheering section. You are the parade (but don’t let it go to your head).
242. If beauty is in the eyes of the beholder and what you behold is ugly maybe your beholder is broken.
243. Today is the best day of your life. No matter what happens to you today or what you do today, today is going to be the best day of your life. How do you know that? Because you do not compare yesterday to today. Today stands alone. The past is the past and the future is not here, but today is your day. It is here, it is now; it is all there is. And even if today is your last day, it will be your best day. Yes, today is perfectly your most excellent day. It is a wonderfully awesome and delightful day, and, it is the only day you have for sure, for no one can claim tomorrow until it is today. Today, right now, is the best day of your life.
244. Expect the best be at peace with the rest. What sense would it make to expect less than the best? It would be nonsense since the best can only happen if you expect the best to happen. If you decide to climb a mountain but don’t expect to make it, why go to the trouble? You expect to finish what you start and you expect the best at the finish, and you are not going to let contrary thoughts undermine and sabotage your plans and kill your desires. And you don’t hang around people who stomp on your expectations. Expect the best and be at peace with the rest.
245. From Instinct to Intellect to Intuition to Liberation to Infinity and Beyond is life’s journey, IN THE MEANTIME, stop freaking-out when life doesn’t happen your way by accepting that life will not always happen your way.
246. How, but by light is dark discerned? Where is knowledge, understanding, and wisdom without opposition in all things? How many heroes without villains? How many noble and selfless without the ignoble and selfish? What can be known without opposites? Can you know hot without cold; high without low; left without right; in without out? Without opposites there would be no knowledge, no value, no appreciation, but..., ignorance would abound, so without opposites, you would not know you are joyful, at peace or happy. Ignorance never was happiness. So be thankful for the dark and the light–they are teachers.
247. You are always true to yourself. You cannot but to thine own self be true. Who is this self you serve? Is it not the self that seeks joy, peace, happiness, and pleasure and to be at peace with itself? Avoid pain, seek pleasure; avoid sorrow, seek joy–to this all are true, thus all are true to themselves. You can adopt a code, convention, standard or set of values and swear it by oath, yet should you fail, you are but being true to yourself? No matter how hard you try, you cannot but to thine own self be true.
248. Hope, feelings, belief, and faith are tools to discover a truth, not substitutes for a truth. If a thing is unprovable at any time, stick it on your mental shelf and continue to use logic, reason, and common-sense to live your life. When you have experienced a thing, belief and faith have an end concerning that thing.
249. You are always in the right place at the right time and never in the wrong place at the wrong time. There are no accidents in life. Everything plays its part perfectly in the cycle of life. If you were supposed to have done it, you would have done it. If you are doing it, you are supposed to be doing it. If you are yet to do it, you will yet do it. If you were supposed to have prevented it, you would have prevented it. If you were supposed to have been there, you would have been there. The universe did not come about by chance or happenstance and neither did you or anyone else nor lives intersecting in time and space (“supposed” to happen merely means, that if you knew everything, every cause and effect and every action and reaction, you would know the beginning, middle and end of everything, and then you could actually say, “It was supposed to happen”).
250. You are not a respecter of persons. You know you did not give yourself your looks, stature, health, intelligence, tenacity, willpower, determination, talents, propensities, strengths, and weaknesses, nor did you determine the advantages or disadvantages of your birth. Because you know this, you do not make fun of people. You do not belittle or demean them. And you do not hold people in high esteem regardless of their wealth, power, importance popularity or education. You treat everyone as kindly as you can, as kindly as they allow, and you do not judge them.
251. “THANK YOU VERY MUCH” is the thought I think when something happens or when I do something that challenges my peace, serenity or bliss. Sometimes I preface my “Thank you very much,” with, “Holy Shit".
252. Try not to be this person: All I need to be happy is to get everything I want, and nothing I don’t want. I want to look perfect and be perfectly healthy. I never want to have an accident and never feel pain. I never want to be bored. I want exciting experiences. I want to be at peace. I want someone to love, and someone to love me. I want friends that are kind and supportive. I want respect and freedom and I want to do worthwhile things. I want the perfect life, and then, and only then, will I be happy. So yes, I want a loving family, a free country, to never get sick, to have high intelligence, impeccable common sense, world-class talents, movie-star looks, bags full of money, to never be in danger and to never have to deal with mean people. In other words, I’ll only be happy if I am never denied my every need, want and desire. And if things don’t go my way, pray to God I’m dead, because if I’m not, you’ll wish you were and I’ll fulfill your wish.
253. If you want a super shortcut to enjoying all that is life, admit you don’t know almost anything, and then, receive all things with thankfulness. Yes, literally say, “Thank you,” for every experience you have. Try it. See what happens. Do it just for one day. DO IT!
254. You know that the only real freedom you have in life is the ability to choose your thoughts; choose what to think; choose how to look at life; choose your mind-set; choose your point-of-view; choose your perspective; choose your attitude. You know you have that power. Why not choose to look at life as an adventure?
255. You want to feel pleasant. You want to feel happy, joyful, blissful, ecstatic. All you have to do to feel pleasant is everyday count your blessings; everyday find something you enjoy and do it; everyday focus your attention on the things that make you feel pleasant, and everyday focus on what you have, and can do, not on what you don’t have, and can’t do.
256. On a practical day-to-day basis when dealing with people, you have to judge and draw conclusions, however, inside, you can be pleasant about it, even if outside you have to be stern, strict, exact and demanding with people (with those people that require you to be stern, strict, exact and demanding). In other words, be practical and as nice as people will let you.
257. If what you do is not motivated by love, your motivator needs fixin’.
258. If your smiler is broken you have an internal, not external, problem.
259. If you want to be miserable adopt someone else’s idea of perfection.
260. You can believe whatever scratches your itch. You can have faith in whatever tickles your fancy. You can hope until your brain hurts. You can trust your feelings until they screw you, and you can swallow all the opinions, biases, prejudices, conclusions, theories and theologies you can stomach, however, no one in the history of wacky can escape the consequences of their manufactured delusions without a lobotomy.
261. Life is inclusive. Humans are exclusive (unless they have experienced the oneness of life). It is human’s exclusive-thinking that causes most of life’s challenges.
262. You are LIFE having a human (you) adventure. You are in charge of your life, nothing else is, and no one else is, unless you allow it. YOU CAN ENJOY ALL THAT IS LIFE MERELY BY CHOOSING TO ENJOY ALL THAT IS LIFE (what’s stopping you?). Most certainly you don’t actually enjoy feeling stressed, worried, afraid, miserable. So stop it. It’s OK to feel good. Just go ahead and enjoy your experiences, all of them–loss, gain, illness, old age. Be joyful (no one is going to beat you up for feeling pleasant, at peace, joyful, blissful, and ecstatic as long as you don’t laugh too loud at funerals).
263. If you die while being mean to someone, you will only get half a virgin in the who-knows-if-there’s-an-after-life, and there’s no guarantee which half, or gender.
YOU HAVE TO BE OUT OF YOUR MIND
If you want enjoy all that is life, If you want to walk through this world in the peace that passes all understanding, If you want to be happy, joyful and blissed-out no matter what is going on in your life, If you want to walk through the valley of the shadow of death, and enjoy it.