INTRODUCTION TO NUTS

INTRODUCTION



If you are NUTS, you are free to enjoy all that is life.  If you are NUTS, you are not a Yo-yo, a crybaby, or insane.  You are sane because you have not handed control of your inner-pleasantness to life’s inevitable pimple explosions. You have not given control of your joystick to people, places and things.  It means your joy, peace and happiness are unshakeable, are not determined by events, situations, conditions, or circumstances.  It means you will joyfully skip through the valley of the shadow of death, eat a corn dog, and relish the journey.


NUTS has 300 thoughts to help you identify, deal with, and not become, a dissatisfied, unappreciative, complaining, annoyed, irritated, upset, angry, pissed-off, raging, tantrum-throwing-crybaby, snowflake, Yo-yo, mad-as-a-hatter energy-vampire human.  These thoughts will help you remain pleasant inside even when life is unpleasant outside, which is better than turning instant prick when life doesn’t please you or doesn’t go your way.


NUTS contains random thoughts...however, I numbered them so you can re-read the ones that make you grit your teeth, swear and smash things.  Plus, you can point ☛ to someone and say, “There goes a 37 with serious 72 problems.”


NUTS is about working on the quality of your inner-life so you can enjoy all that is your outer life.  It reveals  the art of complaining your way to happiness (this book does what it tells you not to do).


NUTS is not mean, is not mean-spirited to humans.  It IS mean and mean-spirited to stupid thinking, is mean to irrational, illogical and nonsensical thinking.  Much of human thinking is disguised bullshit.  Life would be more enjoyable with less puddin’-headed thinkers.  Change your thoughts, change your life.



A FIVE FINGER ☛PREVIEW ☛THIS BOOK:



☛is nuts, and the author is nuts and missed his lobotomy appointment.

☛exposes facts about you and life that should not be revealed until after you’re dead.

☛should have been named, “Idiot’s Guide to Do It Your Self-Brain-Surgery.”

☛is so explosively politically incorrect that everyone with common sense bought extra copies to give to their spouses, partners, roommates, co-workers, and total strangers.

☛may trigger and cause the illogical, irrational, and nonsensical side of your brain to rage against the thoughts in this book by offering you an immediate years worth of orgasmic ecstasy if you will stop reading the book, cuss at it, throw it down, stomp on it, kick it, stomp on it again, cuss at it some more and burn it ( to date, all million copes have been burned).



ABOUT THE AUTHOR



Tom is literally illiterate, but a literary legend in his own mind when he can find it.  He is a low IQ genius of dubious intellect.  He mutilates words, slaughters federal grammar laws, lacks propriety, civility and common sense.   Other than that he’s not funny.  But,  since you have the book, keep it, because the day may come when you run out of toilet paper.

 
In a world gone nuts, the sane are called nuts, and the nuts think they are sane.